Music Saves Lives

Chapter Ten

A/N: sorry it's short 

The last two days were… Well, I’d like to say perfect, but they weren’t. Niall got mad at me for going back to my room and not staying with him. When I got to my room and into bed, I texted him,

*I’m safe and in bed. Night Ni xx*

He replied.

*k night*

That was it. Anyone would take that as anger. Right? Normally Niall would wish me sweet dreams or use cute nicknames. I went to bed crying and woke up crying. Niall called not long after I woke up and he was nothing but cold. His voice was very low and monotone. I felt like he didn’t really want to call me. Someone forced him.

The whole day it was like we didn’t even know each other, just a few polite smiles, but no other contact. What made it worse was I leaving in the next morning. That night he kissed me goodnight and went off to his own room. When I woke up the next morning he texted, saying to text him when I got home. My heart just about shattered.

I didn’t even get a goodbye. Nothing. On the plane home, I thought everything through and decided to just let him come to me. If he was just going to shut me out, I was going to do the same.

Now, its midnight, I got home this morning and my parents grilled me on how my trip was. I lied and said it was perfect. I told them about Simon and the record contract. My dad was surprisingly, really supportive. He wasn’t however happy about me possibly joining the boys for the end of the American leg and the Australian leg of their tour. That leaves me an entire month to record and write a few new songs. Hopefully, most of the songs I have can be used.

While I laid on my bed starring at the ceiling, thinking about my possible future, I couldn’t help but have my mind wonder to Niall. Was he thinking about me? I picked up my phone for the twentieth time in the past hour.

I set my phone back down and sighed.

“Trouble with the boyfriend?” my stepmom asked, walking in an sitting down on my bed.

“Mom, can I ask you something?” I sat up and hugged my knees.

“Sure, sweetheart. That’s what I’m here for.”

“So, this weekend. I felt like Niall was really upset because I wouldn’t… Y’know. And I was going to stay in his room on the second to last night. It was after a concert, so everyone went to Niall’s room to hangout and when Niall was changing the boys were asking me about Niall and I’s y,know. And Niall came out of the bathroom telling them not to talk about what we do in bed and he mention how there was nothing to talk about anyway. The way he said it hurt so I went to sleep in my own room. Since then, he’s been nothing be cold and distant. Why can’t he understand that I have to wait for real this time?”

By the time I was done rambling, I was sobbing and my stepmom was holding me tight.

“Sweetie, He’s a boy. They’re dumb.” She brushed her fingers through my hair and rubbed my back. “If you want to wait to see if it’s love, then you wait. If he doesn’t want to wait, then his loss.” I looked at her through the tears and gave her a weak smile. She kissed my forehead and held me until I stopped crying.

I woke up the next morning in the same clothes I wore yesterday. My eyes burned from the tears. I unlocked my phone and I had nothing but a text from Heather asking if she could come over today. I guess I needed some girl time and it’s been so long since just her and I have hung out. I texted her; telling her to come by in two hours. I showered and did all the usual morning things.    

Heather was right on time and I immediately tugged her into a hug. I couldn’t help but start to cry. She looked worry and she didn’t even have to ask. I started telling her about the weekend, the good and bad. She started calling Niall a prick and I told her not to. He didn’t do anything wrong, I was just a fuck up. Heather kept yelling at me when I blamed myself, but I couldn’t help but think it was my fault. She doesn’t know about my first time, she just knows about the other thing. The thing I didn’t tell Niall. See, I have too much baggage to even walk this earth. I don’t even know if Niall and I are still an ‘us’.

“You have to find out, (y/n). That way you can move on.”

“I guess I do have to know, but what will happen when I go on tour with them? It will be horrible.”

“I don’t know. You just have to go with the flow.” She shrugged.

Later that night, I texted Niall,

*Can we talk?*

*Not now I’m busy.*

I sighed. *fine*

*God damn it (y/n). Just fucking ring me then.*

I read that numerous times and each time my blood boiled and my anger increased.

*Never mind. I won’t bother you. I won’t bother you ever again. Fuck you Niall. We are done. When I come on tour with you guys, don’t expect me to talk to you because it’s not going to happen.*

*I don’t care. I bet you were using me anyway. If it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t even have this opportunity.*

When I finished reading that I whipped my phone at the wall and it shattered into pieces. I can’t believe he would say that to me. I would never use him. Well, if he thinks that’s what I did then, I’ll call Simon.

I found Simon’s business card in my suitcase and I used the cordless phone in my room. It kept ringing and then I realized he was in London and he was most likely sleeping, so I left a voicemail.

“Hello Simon, it’s (y/n), Niall’s friend.” I cringed, I wasn’t even his friend. “I really appreciate your offer, but it’s just not a possibility for me right now. I’m sincerely sorry if I’ve wasted your time. Thank you.” And I hung up.

If Niall was going to think I was using him, than I proved him wrong. If I’m going to be a musician, I’ll do it my way. 

A/N: VOTE AND COMMENT <3

-Em xx