Loving, Breaking, Haunting, Reborn

Chapter 54

Jessica's POV

"Are you sure your ok Miss?" Colin asked. I nodded as I wiped my eyes with the back of my hand. My eyes slightly wet. Just the thought of him upsets me.

They had moved onto their next tour destination a couple weeks ago. Soon they'd go home to England and he would never come back.

But he did before he left. He told me he had loved me. He wanted a place in my life. He would fight to be there.

How could I deny he had feelings for me? Especially after that kiss we shared. The heat of his lips on mine and the raw and passionate emotion held within them, for me.

"Are you sure Miss?" He asked

I smirked and nodded at the small boy. "Don't worry Colin. I'm fine really." He smiled back at me. "Now I think it's time for you to go home."

He shook his head vigorously. "But I don't want to go home. I want to stay with you again." He whined as she tugged on my sleeve.

A couple days here and there I had worked with Colin after school and worked on art projects and things wth him or practicing his letters and numbers, a couple times he had even stayed at my place, I just didn't have the heart to send him back.

But I know that I can't keep him, I have to learn to keep my distance. I can't get too attached to him or I won't be able to let him go.

"Please." He whined.

"I don't know sweetheart. We'll see when we get you home. Come on." I stood up and grabbed hold of his backpack and swung it over my shoulder and than held my purse.

Colin grudgingly stood up and walked over to me and took my hand. We left my office and headed out of the building, after I yelled down to Ari and told her to lock up when she was done her paperwork.

We went to the car and I helped him climb into his seat and than set his bag down in the passenger seat along side my purse.

I climbed into the drivers seat and started the car. I clicked the play button and played the disk with I'm a little tea pot and the itsy bitsy spider.

I bought it when I started having Colin stay with me so that he had good songs and things to listen to like when I was a little kid.

Colin sang in the backseat, swaying side to side and singing along merrily. I smiled as I looked at him in the rearview mirror.

We finally pulled up to the orphanage and I set the car in park outside. I sighed as I looked at the old brick building and slowly climbed out of the car.

I opened Colin's door and helped him unbuckle and climb out. Than I grabbed his bag and my purse and headed inside with him once again gripping tightly onto my hand.

When I got to the desk I made a split decision.

I couldn't let him go. I just couldn't.

"I would like to take Colin home with me." I said to the receptionist as calmly as I could, gripping tightly into Colin's hand.

"For the night again Miss.Ken?" She asked as she picked up her own and was about to begin writing when I stopped her.

"No."

"Than what would you. . . ?"

"I want to adopt Colin." A smile spread across her face.

"I'll go get the Miss. And we'll get the paperwork started." She jumped up from her desk.

I looked down at Colin who had a big and bright smile on his face. "Do you mean I can go home with you forever?" He asked.

I smiled and nodded. "I hope so." I picked him up and held him on my hip. "Forever and ever, you and me buddy."

* * *

"You what?!" Lauren exclaimed after dinner, her eyes wide as she looked at me.

"I couldn't send him there. That place is awful and I love Colin to pieces. I know you do too. And for now Colin will stay in my bed until we get the spare bedroom set up for him to stay in."

She sighed, a smile spreading into her lips. "Alright, alright." She picked up the dishes and brought them into the kitchen. "Now go upstairs and be with your son." She giggled before heading into the kitchen.

I headed up into my room and opened the door to see Colin in one of the pairs of pajamas he had from the orphanage. I'd have to take him out shopping for new clothes soon.

He looked at me silently with a big smile on his face. "What's the matter Colin?" I asked as I walked to the side of the bed he chose to stay on and pulled his blankets up to tuck him in.

He held a book firmly to his chest, Kittens first full moon. It was his favorite book for me to read to him.

"You're my mommy now right?" He asked

I nodded. "I sure am." I smiled at him. I went over to my dresser and grabbed a few things to change into for bed. "Can I call you mommy?" He asked. My eyes widened as I looked into the mirror and at him.

The smile fell off his face. "I guess not." He mumbled as he closed his eyes and turned over.

"Oh no no no sweetie." I shook my head. "I didn't mean that." I closed my drawer and walked to my bed. I set my pjs onto the end of the bed and went over to sit next to him. I set my hand on his shoulder. "It's just I'm not used to it yet. But you can. Don't worry." He rolled over and looked over at me, a shy smile on his face

"Really?" He asked

I smiled and nodded. "Really really."

I just hope all my paper work checks out. Most of it was verified just a few more things needed to go through. Supporters for the adoption and to make sure my house was stable enough.

"Now let's read our story after I change." I jumped up for a moment and went into the bathroom, quickly I changed and headed back out and onto my side of the bed.

I sat next to him and opened the book in front of us. Colin leaned back and listened as I read, snuggled up next to me and soon he began to fall slowly to sleep.

Finally he passed out completely and I set the book onto the nightstand and pulled the blanket up to his chin. Faith jumped up onto the bed and curled up next to him. I kissed his forehead.

"Goodnight Colin." I whispered.

"Goodnight mommy." He whispered. I leaned over and turned out the lights. Lauren opened the door and waved before she headed to bed for the night. I smile and rolled over, facing my soon to be son.

No one will take him from me.