Dear No One | Ethan Dolan Fan Fiction

Chapter 9- Ethan on My Mind

I awoke to the painful sound of my alarm buzzing. I groggily fumbled for the snooze button, but couldn't find it. Slowly, I opened my eyes and my first thought was Grayson and Haley. I cringed at the thought of their names. I was afraid I would see them again at the bus stop. His words began to play in my head, crescendoing until it was a full orchestra playing loudly into my ear. I closed my eyes and fought the thoughts out of my head. The last thing I needed was to become depressed again. I quickly pushed these painful thoughts out of my head and stood up to get ready. I did my usual routine, applying light make up. After much debate, I settled for a black cable knit sweater, some black jeans, and my black beanie to help me withstand the frigid early November weather. Since I had a little extra time, I threw some oatmeal in the microwave to cook. Once it was done, I topped it with some left over raspberries and threw it into a container to eat on the bus.

I stepped outside and was met with a blast of icy air. I scanned for the twins, but they were no where to be seen. The bus pulled up, and at the last second, I saw them running toward the bus. Grayson ignored me (for now) grabbing a seat next to his friend Kevin. Ethan began to walk my direction, but surely he wasn't coming for the empty seat next to me. No one had ever dared sit there, and yet closer and closer he came. Our eyes met, and my heart fluttered. I looked away quickly, desperately trying not to stare at his beautiful face. I looked up to see him sit down next to next to me.

"Hey!" He said flashing me a perfect smile.
"Um, h-hi," I found myself stumbling over my words.
My palms were sweaty and I was afraid he could hear my heart pounding like a drum.
"What's your name? I never did get it,"
Said Ethan,
Oh my gosh he's asking what my name is... The last time some one asked that was when I met Hale- Oh no don't think about her, don't screw this up.
"I-i'm Britt," I said shakily.
Dang it why I am stuttering?!
"Ethan," he said stretching out his hand.
I shook it, and I couldn't help thinking about how soft yet strong and large it was, fitting safely over my own. I wanted to just hold it and never let go, but that would be really awkward so I let go.
"Um, w-why are y-y-you talking to me Ethan?" I asked unsurely.
"Why not?" Said Ethan with a contagious grin.
I looked nervously at my feet. He should know.
"Because you're smart, popular, sweet, everybody love you. I am a nobody. I am teased and pushed around; you'll get killed if you are even seen with me."
"That doesn't detour me. All I see is someone who needs a friend," said Ethan as we pulled up at the school.
"See you around!"

And with that he was gone and I was left alone again, thoughts swirling within me. I could not stop thinking about him. I will probably never talk to him again, but once again, he had made me feel special. I felt less alone. I managed to make it safely to lunch without being beat up. I walked to my usual spot beside the trash can and sat down to eat. A few minutes later, I saw Ethan once again walking toward me. My mouth hung open as he sat down next to me.
"Hey Britt!" He said.
Oh my gosh Ethan Dolan just sat down next to ME on the floor. And he remembers my name. I can't help but think this is something like how I met Haley. Maybe he's really interested in being friends with me.
"Hey Ethan," I said.
"Why do you sit here everyday?" Asked Ethan.
"There is never a seat for me. Haley makes sure of that." I said.
"Why don't you sit with me?" He asked thoughtfully.
"Because you sit with popular kids, and I am just a nobody who happens to be bullied by your twin." I said quietly.
To my surprise, Ethan wrapped one of his strong arms around me and pulled me to my feet. He walked me to the end of the table, and we sat at two empty seats at the end of the table.
"Excuse me! That seat is saved!" Smirked Grayson.
"Yes I know, thanks for saving it for me and Britt." Said Ethan confidently.
"Oh, that piece of trash has a name? Asked Grayson in mock surprise.
"First of all, the only piece of trash at this table is you, and second of all KEEP YOU MOUTH SHUT! It might actually do you some good." Said Ethan.
Grayson had no comeback, so he turned back to his friends, but snuck Ethan dirty looks which he ignored. Him and I made small talk about school and homework until lunch was over.

~After school~
I sat waiting for the bus, daydreaming about Ethan- his perfect smile, his secure grip, his deep voice, his cute hair, he was like a Prince Charming from a book. I pictured him sweeping me off my feet, and holding me, looking at me like I was a million dollar prize. Then he would lean in and our lips would meet in-
"Is someone day dreaming about their hero?" Smirked Grayson.
I bit my lip to keep my words from gushing out.
"Let's take Queen Trash to see her Prince Charming," he said with a sly smile.
He grabbed me by my shirt collar, and took me behind the school where he had beat me up before. I spotted Ethan, tied to a pole on the playground. His strong arms were bound tightly behind him with rope. Kevin stood 'guarding' him.

"Ethan!" I cried.
Grayson instantly silenced me clamping his hand over my mouth. I looked into his eyes, and I could see nothing but anger. His face was red, and his shoulders moved up and down with each deep breath. He raised one clenched fist and took a threatening step toward Ethan.
"Grayson, I need you to tell me something," croaked Ethan.
A sly smirk crossed Grayson's face.
" Grayson Bailey, do you love me?" whispered Ethan.
Instantly, his face changed. The rage left his face like a migrating flock of birds. He looked at his feet.
"Gray..." whispered Ethan.
"SHUT UP! LET ME DO WHAT I NEED TO DO AND THEN I WILL LEAVE! IT'S YOUR OWN FAULT FOR GETTING INVOLVED WITH THAT THING OVER THERE!" he yelled motioning to me." Why do you do this Grayson?" pleaded Ethan.
"Why do you care what I do?" asked Grayson.
"Because I love you Gray."
I felt my heart tearing apart for Ethan. His eyes were filled with love and sympathy. A conflicted look crossed Grayson's face. His fists clenched, but did not move to hit Ethan. He looked at me with hurt in his eyes. Then he turned to Kevin.
"Untie him." he said in a low voice.
"Go," he whispered.

Ethan and I quickly walked away. Ethan didn't say a word; he didn't have to. His eyes were brimming with tears. I wrapped my arms around him nervously, unsure of how he would react. To my delight, he wrapped his around me. I pressed my face into his chest. He smelled like fresh air and grass. When he finally pulled away, tears were running down his cheeks. My heart hurt for him,
"I'm sorry," I whispered.
"You didn't do anything Britt," he responded quietly.
"But I did Ethan. You got hurt because of me," I said, my eyes filling with tears.
"That was my choice," he said with a smile. "One that I will never regret. You are so sweet; I don't understand why Grayson hurts you."
I smiled, tears leaking down my cheeks. Now it was his turn to lock me in his secure arms and make me feel special. I loved it, and part of me wished I could call him more than a friend, but as of a few days ago, I had no friends.
"Thank you," I whispered with a smile.

~That Night~

Dear No One,
Maybe I really am moving on. I know I just nearly got beat up by Grayson, but I also received Ethan's friendship. Funny how through a bad thing, I found a good thing. The problem is that I am afraid to trust Ethan. The closer he gets, the more vulnerable I become.
So I'm a dork so I wrote a poem explaining it more;

Hold on, I need you
Come closer so I you can hold me
I love you, never leave
The memories, the pain
They interrupt our bliss
Like a storm in the night
They drown us while we sleep

I need to feel loved and accepted by someone, but every time they get close enough, the memories return. How do I supress them? My solitude will otherwise literally kill me.

-Britt

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