Crumble: A Destiel AU

[5]

XXX [Castiel] XXX

He went for the door, and I couldn't let him leave me. There was just something telling me that he shouldn't leave. "Dean, please don't leave me." That sentence stopped him in his tracks, and that was the second time that one of us had to whisper to get the other not to leave. In fact, it was all it took for him to practically run back and kiss me right there. It was harder than the one in the car, but it was full of want. "I know now. I know that I want this." His hands intertwined with mine, squeezing like he didn't want to let go. "I don't want you to be faking it just to make me happy." In that moment, he looked at me with soft eyes, and the next sentence made me know everything was actually happening. "Cas, you know I'm a shit actor."

It took three minutes to stop standing there like statues just looking at each other and actually move. "Sleep with me." It was supposed to be a question, but it came out more as a demand. His expression was confused; I didn't know how to treat the situation so it wouldn't be awkward. "Please." Also more of a command. His slow nod and the grip on my hand as we climbed the stairs was all I needed to know that we were going to be alright.

We both stood in the bedroom silently asking questions. Are we going be clothed or in our undergarments as we usually sleep? Which side of the bed does he prefer? Are we going to cuddle, and if we do, who is going to be the one being cuddled? These and more thoughts rush through my head alone, I don't know about his .I want him to take the lead, but I don't want to just come out and say 'take the lead, Dean.' That's irrational and me speaking my mind in these given situations often lead to awkwardness and pity cuddles and I don't want that for us. Eventually Dean pulls my hand in the direction of the bed. Clothes stayed on, sweatpants and t-shirts being the chosen option. I knew we were going to have to take this slow or we would crash and burn, but the whole thing was going achingly slow; but Dean needed time and we had only unofficially officially together for half an hour at the most. We lay separately for a long while, until his arm slid around my frame and pulled our bodies closer together. My hands rested on his, right above my navel. Thoughts about us rushed until I couldn't think anymore and the sweet release of dreamless sleep took over.

Waking up alone was natural to me, but something just felt strange about it after sleeping with Dean. I could smell burning food, and loud swears echoing from the kitchen. I sighed and quickly got myself downstairs. Waking up to Dean trying to surprise me with breakfast wasn't unusual, so he should know by now that the extinguisher was three feet away from the oven and not to cook pancakes over the third notch. Clearly, I needed to teach him that my stove is very old and cannot take his advanced culinary skills. After spreading foam over the emblazed pancakes, I helped him make them properly, correcting him three more times about the oven being old and not being able to go above the third notch. He finally quit turning it up and we had a nice breakfast ten minutes later. He started a delightful conversation while cleaning the dishes, and since it was Saturday, there was no rush to do anything except grocery shopping for the both of us.

XXX [Dean] XXX

When Cas asked me to sleep with him, it was very shocking. He has a very shy personality when it comes to being forward, so it was very unexpected. I knew that he wanted this, so I gave it to him. I nodded slowly and took his hand in mine; a gesture that is still foreign to me. I shut the door behind us and waited for the verdict on how exactly this was going to go down. It took me half a minute or so to realize he's probably internally freaking out and doesn't exactly know how to direct the whole event that was going on. I kinda just rode the wave and took it by ear, I did it as I usually would and he seemed fine with it. First I wasn't sure if he just wanted me to stay in the bed with him or if it was to cuddle. I wasn't sure how this was supposed to work and I didn't know if cuddling would be too soon or what he actually wanted out of this. It was so hard to decide what he wanted and if I should try and at most get shot down or something. It took me twenty minutes of thinking about it, and my arm wrapped around him, and he relaxed a little when I pulled our bodies closer. It didn't take long for me to realize that I made a good choice and I was off to sleep very soon after hearing his breathing so close to me.

The next morning was a tragedy in the making. It all started when I decided I wanted to surprise Cas again with another breakfast. Cas had already rolled off by the time I had woken up, and I was slightly sad that his subconscious moved away from me. I shook it off and headed to the kitchen. After deciding on pancakes and bacon, and making a pot of coffee because I barely made it down the stairs alive; I set off to make the batter and find the stash of bacon. It didn't take long for the stove to catch on fire and Cas to come vaulting down the stairs to scold me on his old stove and obviously put out the fire. He helped me not burn down his house and we made a breakfast together. It was something I could get used to. It was... nice; new but nice.

We had just gotten done putting both of our groceries away, which wasn't much to begin with. Resting on the couch, enjoying each other's company while watching some mindless television was great. We spent hours just watching some guy talk about something incredibly irrelevant to my life and I didn't care. But what made that day remarkable was when I looked at Cas, and he was just staring at me. I tilted my head slightly as if asking him why he was looking at me; and within a heartbeat, we were kissing, and neither of us wanted to stop.

dg9y'