The Epitome (Ep-ih-tome) Of Epicness

My Epic Adventure of GINGERNESS (OF EPICNESS)

              "AHHHH!!!" I screamed. 

"WHAT!" screamed Joe. 

"YOUR A FRIGGEN GINGER!! OH MY GOD. I LOVE YOU!!" I squealed. 

"So.." he said. 

"Thats amazing!" I screamed. 

"So what.. I've always been one. And I've known you since the 3rd grade. Whats up with you?" said Joe. 

"HEY! You should tots come with me on my epic adventure, to the land of epicness. (Actually it's the land of the hobo's. Oh how I do like them hobo's but he doesn't know that mwahahahaha)" I said. 

"Nah. Im good." Joe said as he walked away. 

"I'll catch you later." he called back over his shoulder. 

"No." 

I said to my self. "you'll catch me now!" --not being inappropriate-- I ran up to him so fast, it was like inhuman how fast I ran. I pulled out a potato sack I got from Erica and snatched him.

 "Ahh what the hell are you doing, Cassandra?" he yelled from my potato sack. 

"You'll see." I chuckled, and started walking.

              It was probably about 9:30 or so when I got to the park. It was all dark and stuff. And I was like "Where'd the fucking sun go, home skillet?" but I got no answer. "Hmm." I said as I pulled Joe out from the sack i'd been dragging around all day. "WAKE UP GINGER FRIEND!!" I screamed in his ear while poking him in the eye. 

"Ah. Where the hell are we?" he asked. "The park silly. This is where our journey beings." I chuckled. 

"What??" he asked.

"You'll see." I said. 

"I wish you would stop saying that," he said as he sat down next to me on the park bench. 

"Get up! We're going for a ride," I yelled as I flew down the side walk. Joe said nothing and just followed.

        "Get in that car." I yelled. "Alright keep ya knickers on." Joe yelled back. 

"Hey be nice or so help me god i'll poor Dr. Pepper on you." I said as I pulled a six pack out of my pocket. 

"Alright. Alright. Please no Dr.Pepper! I'll be good." he pleaded. 

"Alrighty then. Then. Then. Lets go go go." I hoped into the car. 

"Ok now I just have to figure out how to drive it." I said as I started it up. 

"Oh GOD!" yelled Joe. 

"HOLD ON IMMA GET A VISION NOW. I CANS A FEEL IT COMINGA UP NOW." I screamed at the top pf my lungs. I started shacking and making animal noises because I enjoy scaring the crap out of the people around me. "Alright! Let's go. I just got a vision on how not to drive a car. But imma follow them anyway." I said. 

"Oh! My! God! We're going to die!" he cried. 

"Probably." I said with a smile. Then I floured it down the road. I flew down the main road dogging all the cars like a ninja. "I guess Leah's ninja training paid off." I said, ignoring Joe's relentless demands.

"Slow down." "Stop running red lights" "No you cant drive on the sidewalk you'll kill some one" and "You cant go down there that's a one way street." What ever. WEEE WOOO WEE WOOO. 

"Ah shitting monkeys. There's cop's on our tail buddy. We'd better loose him!" I said as I took a sharp turn. Joe screamed. "Alright. This is a nice spot. Joe you stay here. Imma go eat some potato salad in that corner over there." the car squealed and I hit the breaks so hard that the car flipped over on its side. I slid out and sat in the corner then I was joined by 3 hobo's. "Hey." I said to one. "Would ya like some potato salad?" I handed him some. 

"Sure." he yelled.

        "Hey boys wanna see something cool?" I said as I pulled out a gun and a crayon. I put the crayon standing up on the ground. I pointed the gun at it hoping to shot the head off of it. I fired but I missed. KABOOM!! a loud explosion startled the hobo's and they scattered all over the place. "OOP'S! I hit the car." I said "Oh well." I picked up my salad and ran away singing.

       "What happened to you?" asked my neighbor Mrs.FartyAss (I forget her real name). 

"I heard a car got blown up. I know you did something ya little punk." she said. 

"Well you see. Um well.I put my friend Joe in the car I stole. Then I flipped the car over and left it on its side so I could party it up with some hobo's. Then I did what most people would and tried to shoot the head off of a crayon and I kinda missed. It hit the fuel tank of the car. Im ok but I think my little ginger friend isn't. I think in the explosion my Dr.Pepper spilled on him and killed him." I said with a have smile and a shrug. 

"You think the Dr.Pepper killed him? Wow your one sick Mamma Jamma." she said as she walked back into her house. 

"Oh well i'll find another ginger." I said with a sigh, then skipped along humming the Bat Man theme song. 

 --Ten Minutes Later-- "Da Na. Da Na. Da Na. Da Na na na na na na na na. DA NAANAAA!!.