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55

Edited.

Lucy's Pov

There's blood everywhere.

This is the most I have cut myself in a day. I didn't stop sliding the blade across my arms until I felt tired. Tired? I've never felt tired before, not after cutting myself.

I slowly and painfully put the blade back where it was and lean against the wall and see that my phone has a message from Gregg. "Love, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have spoken to you that way, I shouldn't have reacted that way. Forgive me, please." I don't reply to his message; I simply read it again.

Shouldn't spoken to me that way? He shouldn't have brought up the topic in the first place. I would have never told him anything and he would have never known anything.

I wouldn't have come home straight to the blade and cut myself again.

I feel lightheaded.

A knock startles me a bit but I don't react quickly. "Lucille, honey. Are you alright? Why did you come home angrily?" It's my mother. She's worried about me. My mother is worried about why I came home angry. "Lucille, honey." She calls again. Why can't I talk quickly? Why can't I find the strength to tell her I'm fine? "Honey, open the door." She says again.

This time, I do speak. "I'm fine."

"Why do you sound out of breath? What's wrong? Honey, open the door." My mother begs. I shake my head but then I realize she can't see me. Stupid. "I'm sleepy." I truthfully admit. I don't know why I'm sleepy, I just am. My mother doesn't say anything anymore; maybe she walked away.

How could I lie to so many people? My mother, my friends, Gregg, Gregg's mom, myself. Do they even believe my lies? Do I even believe my own lies?

My eyes are getting heavier; I look down at my hands -both of my arms - they both have cuts, fresh cuts. They both have blood drying and somewhat dripping. The blood is now on my jeans. I feel even more lightheaded and tired then before. I want to close my eyes but right when I'm about to close them, I hear my doorknob jiggle and I watch it turn.

The door bursts open and I see my mother and father, mom rushes to me, "Lucille, what happened to you!? What did you do!?" My father stands at the door looking utterly shocked, he doesn't say a word even though his mouth is hanging open. I look back at my mom, her eyes are sad and filled with concern.

"What did you do, honey?" She cries.

"Don't cry." I manage to whisper. "I love you, mom. I'm so sorry."

My mother shakes her head, "Why did you do this?" She takes my arms in her hands and presses her forehead against mine as she sobs.

My father finally snaps out of it and dials something in his phone. "I need an ambulance now, my daughter is losing a lot of blood! Hurry!" He almost sounds concerned.

The last thing I am able to see before my eyes shut closed is my mother crying.

After that, everything turns black.