Pan

Desires

It was nights like these when I missed London. The absence of honking street cars and chiming clock towers made me homesick. Whatever it was Pan was planing, I didn't want any part of it. I figured not knowing was better than the possibility of his plan being evil...but he wouldn't...would he?
I cared for him, no denying that. I thought about me and him, if we would ever have a future together. I'm not sure if I'm hopeful, or just plain naive. I know he cares for me, so what's he so worried about? Was there someone else before? Am I not what he desires?
Soft music flooded the silent air. I climbed up on the side of the treehouse and peered onto the roof. He was there, lost in his music again, consumed by his thoughts. He couldn't possibly have evil intentions...
"Pan...", the word softly left my mouth before he turned around and helped me onto the roof. He bent one knee and stretched out the other, as I drew both of my knees to my chest.
"I know you're missing home."
"What makes you think that?"
"I know that look in someone's face."
I continued to stare at the ground, wary of making eye contact with him. There was something intimidating about how he always knew what was on my mind, but also felt somewhat comforting.
"You confuse me.", I said.
"I can say the same about you."
I looked up surprised,
"How? I mean...I'm just...me."
"You...make me think differently. You make me feel things...I just have never experienced. It's a good thing..."
"It's like I never know where your head is at, what you're thinking, and it's like you instantly know what I'm feeling...like you instantly know me."
"Not so much you individually, rather people. I know how people think...their fears, their hopes, their desires..."
He put his finger under my chin and lifted it. He stared into my eyes with a sense of longing, carefully reading into every detail of my eyes.
"I told you we can't do this, you're going to get hurt."
He knew I still cared for him, just by looking into my eyes.
"Then why do you still care for me?", I said looking at the compassion mirrored in his eyes.
"Damn it ___...", he whispered before pulling me towards him and pressing his lips against mine. He paused for a moment afterwards, our foreheads still touching and his lips only inches away.
"I don't want to hurt you...", he whispered.
"Then don't...", I replied before pulling him in for another kiss...