Funny or Die

#TeenagePost 9

Teenage Post: 9


Dear microwave,
Why is my plate boiling hot and my food still cold?
Sincerely, Everyone!


You just realized...
Miley isn't Hannah anymore.
Demi isn't Sonny anymore.
Selena isn't Alex anymore.
Disney isn't Disney anymore.


I will not be impressed with technology until I can download food from the Internet


I hate when I'm singing a song and someone joins in... I'm like "Bitch this isn't High School Musical"


I remember when my best friend was shy and quite. I created a Monster!


Crying is how your body speaks when your mouth can't explain the pain you feel.


Did you ever have a dream that seemed so real, you aren't sure if it was a dream or if it actually happened?


When your talking to someone and their spit lands on your face


The moment your on YouTube singing along and the music stops loading: The Fuck Bruh?!?


Microsoft be like "Page Not Found"
I'm like "...Well Bitch Find It"


I miss when I was little, and didn't care about my weight, clothes or hair, I just did what made me happy.


Me being rude: "Shut the fuck up"
Me being polite: "Please shut the fuck up"


2014 is less than 5 months away just let that sink in...


If you want to be together, you have To-get-her


How to find the name of a song: Type all the words you now on Google and hope for the best


*at the end of Exam*
Teacher: "PUT YOUR PENS DOWN"
Me: "Relax bitch, it's a pen not a gun"


*Missed a call* *Calls back* *No answer* What, did you die within 3 seconds?


*Battery low please connect to charger* Umm your a smartphone connect yourself


I always wonder why W is pronounced double U, when it's clearly double V


I hate it when I think of the best comeback an hour after the argument



#Fuck Society


Society's standards are fucked. If your reserved and quite your emo. If you're open and expressive your attention hungry. If you're a virgin by 16, you're doing something wrong. If you lose it by 16, you're a whore. If you don't compliment yourself, you're begging for compliments. If you do compliment yourself, you're full of yourself. If you're unique you're weird. If you're normal, you're boring.
It's hard to find yourself in a world so centered in perfection, When in reality imperfection is what defines us.


Agree?