Too Much

Chapter Nine

Louis

It was almost as if the night was sympathizing with her.

As if the moon knew what she felt - its dim light reflecting her dull and defeated state. As if the night breeze wanted to comfort her - enveloping her in an embrace, only it was cold, like her eyes. As if the crickets were wanting to cheer her up - murmuring sweet nothings over the silence to make her feel better, only she couldn't understand, like she couldn't understand him.

As if everything that night was comforting her. Every single thing but me.

I was known as a happy person. Always laughing, fooling around and making sassy remarks. That should make me good at cheering people up, right? And I was. But something was telling me that cheering up wasn't what she really needed so I kept my mouth shut, thus, the lingering silence.

We were in my car driving back to her house and no one was saying a thing. She was looking out the window, maybe watching the lights as it drew glowing lines as we swiftly passed by or maybe nothing in particular. I, on the other hand, was trying to focus on the road but failing when I occasionally took stolen glances at her, opening my mouth to say something but closing them after realizing I had none.

I was crap at comforting because I wasn't really used to people this upset. Cheering up was nothing a silly joke couldn't do. However, this situation was a different one. I was certain I would've had told her hundred jokes and she still wouldn't be fine. Heck she would've punched me straight at my face.

I sighed. I felt useless.

We arrived at her house and she didn't move a bit. That was when I confirmed she was staring at nothing in particular. She was stuck in her own head, she didn't even realize we were already infront of her house.

"El babe, we're here." I whispered while gently touching her hand.

She slowly turned to me and I almost shivered at her look. Her puffy crimson eyes looked so hollow, hopeless and defeated. I wanted to cry with her then and there but I realized she would think I pity her. She never wanted pity.

"Thank you." she said. Her voice sounded strained, hoarse. She sounded flat and empty.

Her shaky hands fumbled with detaching the seatbelt and opening the door. She stepped one foot out before pausing for a moment and stepping out completely. She walked towards the door, slowly dragging her feet while hanging her head low. If I didn't know better, I would've definitely mistaken her as a zombie.

I hesitantly revved the car with a heavy heart but didn't drive away, I pondered for a moment.

I couldn't just leave her alone. Especially after what just happened. But I couldn't really comfort her because I had no idea how. I would most probably say bloody sh*ts that would mess it up even more.

I was about to step on the gas pedal when my mind mocked me.

So you'd just leave her alone? What happened to 'looking after her'?

Oh screw it.

I quickly turned the car engine off and scurried out of the car to run after her. However, as soon as I reached the front door, I heard faint sobs that later erupted into loud cries and wails from the other side of that door.

"You lying bloody b*stard! I hate you! I hate
- huk! -you to guts! You're unfair-- Unfair and liar! I bloody- huk! -hate you but I love you- f*ck no! I hate you! -I hate that I love you!" She rambled inbetween sobs.

I pounded on the door but she didn't open it. "El, it's Louis." I was about to bust in but I tried twisting the knob first. It clicked - it was unlocked. I guessed she broke down as soon as she stepped inside earlier. "Move away from the doorway, yeah?"