|Recap|
-
And that's when it all started...
-
Okay I hate authors note as much as you might too so I'll stop but at the end I'll say maybe vote and comment what you think;) enjoy
-
|Hazel|
I followed them upstairs and trust me. This may seem so weird to just trust people I've never met but I trust them with my life and I hope they understand that and don't go against it. They aren't even like that so shut up hazel i said to myself. I walked into the room they unlocked and kellin led me to the couch. "Want anything to drink?" He asked. I can't have anything! It has calories!! My mind says water has it too!!
My face went stiff. "Ah no I'm fine but thanks" I mumbled and Jesse eyed me. "Get her a bottle of water kellin"he said. "But she said-" Kellin was cut off by Jesse, "Kellin" Jesse said and kellin went to the mini fridge and grabbed out a water bottle. I felt myself panicking a little. Kellin came back and slowly handed my the water bottle and held out his hand for me to grab the bottle. He was shaking a bit. "It's okay. I won't kill you" I joked. It would be too much calories.. Not that I'm saying he's big or anything.
They waited for me to take a sip and I stared at it. "So tell me about you day" I said trying to change the subject. "It was good" they both said. "Tour?" I asked. "It's okay. Just drink it" Jesse said. He noticed I was on to something. "I can't" I whispered. "Why not?" Kellin asked. "Reasons... Ok just tell me what you wanted in the first place" I said and Jesse turned to kellin. "Why were you on the very edge of that place... On that cliff" he asked. "What? I don't think that was me" I faked laughed and bit my bottom lip. "It was you. I saved you" he said.
I felt my world stop. Like I was in this dark cave and I could see a thing but my thoughts being faced with faces screaming anything negative they could think of. My head started spinning and then I was brought back to reality.
"Told you..." Kellin said. "Wait what?" I asked. "I just said that we love and care for all of our fans... There is no way you can deny it" he said leaving me with no words to say.
I shook my head before getting up. "Look... I'm alone so I think I'm better off... Dead.. just leave me be. I'm a fan and I'll always be seen as a fan and nothing more so why care?" I said with my words fainting into silence little by little. I escaped the hotel room as fast as I could and left them be. They don't need to have to take care of me or watch over me. I am so used of being alone so why can't I just be alone?
I heard the faint clicks from my black converse making a sound as I walked along the sidewalk probably a mile or two away from the hotel. That's what amazing about eating disorders... You have more control and energy but you have to be able to know how to use it.
(This is what the mind says, not physically helping ok so like I said, not promoting eating disorders because it fucking sucks and you have more emery for only a short while until you get more brittle everyday)
I grabbed my waist with my arms because I felt the cold air hit my body in the now getting dark night. It was getting darker and darker and I didn't have anywhere to go or stay at do I guess I will just keep traveling to no where. I turned around to only see my shadow and so I sighed. What fan would actually say 'fuck you' to their idol. The one person they look up to. Why did I do that!!! He was actually caring for me and he seemed so upset about it. I am so sorry kellin. I am sorry for making you worry about a complete stranger who doesn't even deserve your kindness or your attention.
I shook my head in disappointment to myself. "Why did my dad think I was the cause of my sister harming herself. I promised him id never do such a thing like that to myself nearly a year ago. I am just an innocent girl with grades higher than my feelings that gets picked on at school just because I'm smart and that I like a band named sleeping with sirens... Now this just crumbles up in one fucking week and now my life feels like it just went against me and I just can't-" I broke down and continued to walk.
I couldn't see so I wiped my face and continued to cry. "Please!!" I heard someone say in the distance. "Stop!" They yelled. I turned around to see Kellin? I hurried up and wiped my tears and tried to act normal as possible but he caught up and noticed. "Where are you going?" He asked with a worried face. "Home" I said and looked at the empty roads. "It's going to rain soon. Do you at least need a ride?" He asked and I shook my head.
I let tears slip that I was attempting to hold in. "hey hey hey" he said and pulled me in for a hug. "What I saw will not change anything between us okay? I won't be too nice if you'd like or just give you the attention if you don't want it" he said and then that's when i realized who he was. He wasnt Kellin Quinn. He was just Kellin. One of the most caring and loving person on this planet. More of what the world needs.
"I am sorry.. It's fine... " I said snapping back into reality. "Want to go back? I can tell you have no where to go" he said. "I don't want to cause any problems with anyone there though" I said and he cupped my cheek. My heart felt so twisted up. "Nothing will be wrong for you to stay the night with us. We do have spare couches in that huge room. We bought one of the largest rooms out of that hotel. I swear it won't be bad at all" he said making me just think deeply. "Why do you do that?" I asked him. He looked at my with a confused look. "Do what?" He asked while smiling.
"Trust a stranger... What if I was that type of fan who just wants your number or to jump into your pants? Or just a fan who would use you guys?" I asked and he smiled widely. "Because you just proved you weren't now come on" he said turning around and started walking back. I stood there and sighed until I dragged myself along with Mr. Quinn.
"Fine" I said and walked by his side and I could see him smiling. "By the way, I hate your sweatshirt" he said while smiling bigger. I looked down. "It's a jumper to correct you" I said and smirked. "Oo so she's sassy" Kellin said while laughing. I feel like I can trust him. "Shut up" I said and smiled. "There's that beautiful smile" he said and looked forward and just stared ahead. I stopped smiling and felt my cheeks burn up. Holy hell chill the fuck out Hazel!! It's so obvious you like him so calm our nerves.. He just said I have a beautiful smile.
"Blushing much?" He asked looking at me and I couldn't speak. "Hey look the hotel!" I said and he smiled and looked down at his shoes and back up. "Adorable" he chuckled and I couldn't speak. TEASING MUCH!!
-
Hope this is going well? I am into my own writing but vote because it's much appreciated :)
-
