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I wiped tears as I felt so embarrassed. So unworthy. So useless. I had no where to go. Maybe I can stay the night at a friends house.
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|Kellin|
I stormed into the bus and threw my sweatshirt on the couch and went into my bunk. "Kellin there you are! Where were you?" Gabe asked nicely. "Please leave me alone" I said sadly and just turned my back towards the curtain and the entrance of the bunk. "What's wrong kellin? What happened?" He asked. I shook my head. "A met a fan in the most terrible way someone could ever meet someone and she just.... She won't listen to me" I said and I saw his face turned confused. "Wait come out here because the others should know" he said and I rolled out of my bunk and joined everyone.
"I have something to confess" I said and everyone looked at me. The game was paused and I felt nervous. "Sorry for not even brightening our tour, sorry for my depressing actions and I promise I'll be more social with you all because it's not right.. And" I stopped myself and swallowed. "yes kellin?" Our manger said. "I-I..." I couldn't speak. Jesse patted my arm and helped me stay cool.
"I met a fan" I said but was cut off by Jack. "And? What's with your attitude? It was a fan, we see them all the time Quinn" he said furrowing his confused brows and took a sip from his red plastic cup that could be beer. "No. She was about to jump off a cliff so I saved her and she took off running" I said sternly and everyone stared at me. "I lost her and that's what fucking sucks" I said and sat down on the couch and felt my legs drop and my heart being stabbed.
Everyone's faces looked pained. Even the managers surprisingly but they do have feelings and a heart too. "what? Okay give me the whole story" Gabe said.
"Okay.. I was going to go on top of an apartment nearby because I wanted a cool view of where we are and I saw her at the edge and she took a step so I threw myself forward to save her.. She was a fan because she had a sleeping with sirens sweater on and some black jeans with a beanie. No emo hair but just brown hair. She was crying and sobbing saying how she was done and I think I talked her out of suicide while I held her and let her cry but then she screamed to me about how I saved her and she wanted to die.. It fucking hurts to see her in this position. None of our fans deserve this. I need to find her. I need to" my voice cracked and I felt my eyes water.
Jesse slammed me into a hug. "Kellin we will find her together. I promise. We don't have a show until two more days anyways so let's go. Put your sweatshirt on because it's windy" he said and walked out of the tour bus. I got up and put it on and the boys told me good luck and to be careful and stay strong and I thanked them.
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"Are you sure she was here? She could have went home Kellin" Jesse said looking around the building and I just got down from the building. "Yes I swear she was here and do you really think someone who attempted suicide would want to go home?" I said looking around and making a point. My eyes searched for the brunette who looked awfully skinny but I'm not here to body shame anyone.
"Kellin please. We have been looking for about 2 hours. Can we please go back to the bus? We have a show to play soon in a couple of days, we need rest" he said. I sighed and then nodded and Jesse looked at me with sparkly eyes. I went back to where the bus was. Justin wanted to stop by to see his family but we should be heading out soon. We made it to the bus and bumped into the others. "Good timing! Cmon we were just heading out boys so I hope you have everything. And by the way, we were rich enough to afford a van so our managers and techs and merch people will be staying in there..so you all have your own bus" our tour manager said. I smiled and thanked him. Tom is one of our managers. He is like our tech to all instruments and a little bit like our personal security guard. He's an amazing person!! As we pulled out of the driveway and started to head out to the hotel we checked in from.
When we got there.. We had to wait a couple of minutes because the lady at the front desk was gathering out 4 room keys. Us band mates had to share a room because our managers and techs didn't feel like sharing rooms.
I waited and she was checking a chart I guess that she had a list of people who had a room. I turned and looked away but turned back again so fast. It was her. I stared at her shocked but she didn't see me. She wasn't even looking our way. Her eyes were red and she stayed put in her sleeping with sirens sweatshirt staring off looking to the more left. I turned back to my right and got our key and handed Jesse the spare key. I began to stare all over again and Jesse noticed.
"Is that her?" He asked and I simply nodded. "Come on" he said and walked over towards her. I was too busy staring until I saw Jesse next to her. "JES- don't" I whisper shouted and then hurried to them. The others left us behind while they went upstairs. The girl laid her eyes on us and then went wide. She nervously looked down and looked around and held her waist with her arms and rocked back and fourth slowly. "Hey" I said and smiled. She smiled and then it dropped. "Hi" she mouthed. "Not much of a talker?" I asked and she didn't say anything but keep her head down. Jesse looked at me. "A mute?" Jesse asked. The girl turned away from us and I elbowed Jesse and glared at him.
"Listen.. I have to go" she said and walked away until I grabbed her wrist. She turned back at me frantically. "What?" She asked politely. "Would you like to talk about what happened? We an go upstairs where it is quieter. You can trust us you know. They know. Well Jesse does" I said. She sighed for the longest time and then nodded and I let go and she followed us upstairs.
And that's when it all happened....
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