Time; Don't Let It Slip Away

Out Comes The Lies.

It's been months since I came off birth control, and Steven and I first had sex without any protection.

It was July, I finished my tour weeks ago, and we're just hanging out around our L.A home. I hadn't gotten pregnant once, which I didn't mind... I mean, some people were meant to get pregnant and be great mothers, and others weren't.... I put myself in the category of those who weren't. 

"What are you thinking about, Mia?" Steven said, turning off the tv and facing me.

"Ohh... nothing." I sighed 

"Come on... spill." He smiled, and put his hand on my knee. 

"Well... I was just thinking about how fun my tour was... and how annoyed I am that I can come up with two more songs to finish this album." I sighed, lying. 

"It was fun, wasn't it?" Steven chuckled, and pulled me into him, kissing the top of my head. 

I was shocked Steven didn't realize I was lying to him. I mean, If I do get pregnant, then it happens. Whatever comes my way, Steven and I will face... together. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I woke up around 7 the next morning. I didn't feel like myself. I wasn't balanced; my chakras didn't feel the same. 

I hopped into the shower, and instantly felt this sickening clench in the pit of my stomach, just like I had that night I got extremely drunk after visiting Pete's for the first time in years; this time... I wasn't hung over. 

I turned off the shower, and wrapped a towel around myself. I calmly walked over to the toilet, kneeled down in front of it, and threw up.

This was incredibly poor timing on Steven's part, because just then, he walked into the bathroom.

"Oh my god, Mia!" He gasped and ran over to my side, and held my hair back for me. "Baby, are you okay? What's wrong?"

"I'm not sure... I think It's food poisoning." Lie number two. I knew, or had an extremely good idea of, what was going on. "Or the Flu, or something." I muttered 

"Awe, Babe, do you want me to run out and get you some medicine or something?" He asked, with worry in his gorgeous eyes. 

"N-no!" I stuttered... almost a little too quickly. "No... Love. I'm fine. I'll run out and get it, I need some fresh air, anyway." I smiled, and got up. I flushed the toilet, then went over to the sink, and brushed my teeth. 

I got back into the shower, since it was cut short, and finished washing the shampoo out of my hair.

When I got out, I put on a pair of vintage high waisted denim shorts, and an old band teeshirt, which I cut to hang off my shoulder. I put these very large sun glasses on, and kept my wavy hair down infront of my face so no one would recognize me. 

I slid into my little mini cooper, which people hadn't seen me drive in the tabloids, yet, so I figured it'd be a good hide out from the paparazzi; especially because I had blacked out windows. 

I hopped into the car, and drove out to the drug store.

I didn't even want to risk having the clerk recognize me, so I just found the pregnancy tests on my own. 

I couldn't decide on which brand, so I bought two of them. I slid the money over the counter, with my sunglasses still on and my hair over my face, not saying a word to the woman behind the counter, who just kept a smile on her face.

"Don't worry, honey. Whatever the results, it wont be that bad. Don't seem so gloomy." She smiled. 

"Thanks." I said in a bashful voice, hoping she wouldn't recognize me.

"Hey... Do I know you from somewhere?" SHIT. She tried to study my face, but I just looked in the opposite direction.

"Nah... I'm new in town. First time to L.A, you know?" Lie number three. I was on a hot streak today. 

"Yeah..." She whispered to herself. "Yeah, I do know you!" She said a little louder, then leaned into my ear to whisper something to me. "You're Mia Lynn Tyler, right?"

"Please don't tell any of the paps you saw me here, or that I bought this. Please, Steven doesn't know yet, and I...." I paused, almost bursting in to tears.

"Don't worry, honey." She smiled a sincere, heart warming smile. "Your secret's safe with me. I'm a huge fan, by the way." 

"Thank you." I grinned and took the bag, and walked out, back to my car.

I slid down into the drivers seat. Just holding the box in my hand, and reading it. 

It says I should have my answer with in minutes. I plugged in my IPod and blasted 'Crazy' just to calm me down. It was my favorite song, ever written, and whenever Steven knew I was adjitated or upset, he would sing, or hum it to me.

I drove home, listening to nothing but this same song over and over again. 

I hid the tests in the deep back pockets of my shorts, and walked back into the house, taking my glasses off, and putting my hair into a bun before Steven could question why I looked like I just committed a murder. 

I sprinted into the bathroom, and locked the door behind me. I didn't even bother reading the labels on the box, or the directions since I had already done so in the car. I ripped off the packaging with my teeth, and threw the box on the floor, then went ahead and did my business, and peed on the different sticks. 

I set the four tests, 2 from each brand, on the counter, and waited for the results to develop. 

By the time I washed my hands, and dried them, the tests were done. 

I looked down at the four white sticks lying on my bathroom counter, and stared... in shock or horror, at the four little pink plus signs.