For Your Eyes Only

F i f t y - f o u r

Two weeks after,

"So. . ." Louis trailed while playing with his fingers. He's seated on Taylor's couch while she is walking around, trying to pack her bags.

Taylor stopped what she was doing and raised an eyebrow. "What?" She asked though she really knew where he is headed.

"I can't really change your mind?" He asked.

She shook her head, "No, you can't."

Louis frowned. "Jeez! Nashville is so far away! How am I supposed to see you? Damn it, Taylor." He complained with a raised voice. He stood up and walked around the room, complaining and muttering out reasons why she shouldn't go. He immediately sunk back on the couch after.

Taylor can't blame him, because now all of a sudden, she decides to leave New York and come back to Nashville. She had been arranging it for a while now, and she already handled everything about it. All she needs to do is attend one last shift tonight and it's a straight shot to Nashville. To be quite honest, she never liked the idea, at all, because that would mean being distanced from her friends and literally most of what she worked hard for, but if it's what it takes to get her old life back, she's willing to take it. For the past two weeks, she wasn't able to sleep, - she even changed her shifts to adjust to that- she would always end up waking up in the middle of the night, she would always find herself nauseous, she's always unfocused, also unstable like she would faint any minute. She took a couple of medicines for it. . . and they helped a little, just a little though.

She sunk on the space beside Louis and laid her head on his shoulder. "Aww, I'll miss you too." Taylor said jokingly in the hopes that it'll help calm him down.

He sighed, "I'd love to be in the joking mood, but Nashville, Tay? I'm never going to see you!"

"There's this thing called video calls, you know. And I'm pretty sure we could still see each other, just not often." Taylor mumbled. After two seconds, she stood up and continued walking around.

"It's not the same." He pouted.

"Trust me, I wouldn't choose this too. But, it just really happens that I've been feeling awful these past weeks. I mean, I should feel better, but then something is telling me that I made the wrong decision. This'll really help, I need to get away from here." Taylor explained.

Louis looked at her with doubtful eyes. She removed her head from his shoulder so their gazes locked. He raised his eyebrow and said, "It's also what you did when you left Harry, thinking it was a solution. What did that bring you? History repeats itself unless you learn from your past mistakes."

"So you're saying me leaving now and back then are both mistakes?" Taylor asked. "No, Louis, can you please understand my point? I can't stay here. You know what's going on. Do you have any idea how much this emotional stress is killing me?"

Louis stared at her for a while, looking at the dark shades around her empty, tired eyes, her colorless cheeks and her pale skin. "God, you're right! Have you even been taking care of yourself?! Jeez! Harry will kill you!"

"That's pretty much the worst joke you could possibly say, and haven't you noticed? He already did. Do I even look like I'm alive to you?" Taylor said with a fake smile. She started feeling a bit heavy inside and she felt the urge to just cry but no tears came out so she stared at Louis with the pain visible only in her eyes.

Louis stared at her, rendered speechless of what she said. He seemed like he hardly have the words to say. "I-I--I'm. . I'm s-sorry if-"

"Don't apologize, I'm just clearing out my point." She said, completely unable to understand what she is feeling. One moment ago, she was this cheerful joker, then suddenly she became this emotional being. She never liked how she acts this way but she really can't control herself sometimes.