The Lifeguard

Chapter 9: The white room Part 1

For the first time in my life my head was clear. I understood the meaning of life and it was beautiful. I was in a white room. It was the same room that I had been in before the trip started. The white room. This room had three picture frames each showing some strange painting that I could not make out. It had a desk and a lamp. 

It was simplistic and minimalist but this room summed up my entire life. The trip I just had was evident of this room. This room created that trip. This room was my life. My mind had been overloaded with information I had long forgotten. Information I didn't want to remember. 

The pain and loss I didn't want to ever understand. They say ignorance is bliss, I could never agree more. Living as an optimist is so much better than a realist. I understood a lot more about what I have done. Why people like Loretta Mchonda didn't like me. Why Harry didn't like me. Why that person in year 10 didn't like me. It all made sense. Holy Shit. 

I felt like I had just matured. Evolved even. Was it the magic mushrooms or something more that made me feel this way? I left the white room and went to the bathroom. I still heard the trance music play and could feel my body jumping to the beat. I went to take a piss and noticed the bowl sink was very far down.

 The bowl of the toilet looked never ending. It reminded me of something out of Alice in wonderland. I then looked in the mirror. A mistake that you should never do. Locked in a room looking in the mirror. I saw a face I never saw before. I saw myself as an old man. Homeless and poor. 

 I would have been about 65 years old. He then disappeared and I saw myself again. Was this how I look? Was that a possible future? I never saw myself this way? Thoughts flooded my mind and I needed to leave this place. I was going mad.

I finally left the toilet and went to the main lounge area and saw Tony drinking water. 

"Tony, you have to see this room"

"Jay, what  is happening, this is amazing!" Tony said. 

His eyes wobbled and his lips where bright red. This would have scared me but not the current me. My state of mind did not care how Tony looked. My deepest emotions, my greatest fears where gone.

"Tony I understand, my whole life I was worried about how other people think about me. I understand it now. It makes sense." I said as I could not keep my enthusiasm. 

Tony looked a tad confused.

"Look Tony come with me" I grabbed him by the hand and took him to the white room. 

As soon as I opened the door I saw a vision of everyone sitting down in the room. It was very vivid and had a very strange sensation akin to that of how Peter Fonda saw his death in the movie Easy Rider. 

"BRO WHAT THE FUCK" Tony said as he looked around the white room.