Deep in the Meadow

|6| captured

"Stay calm. Stay calm." I tell myself in a barely audible whisper. I'm crouched in the corner of my cell in the torture gym, where I woke up a few minuets ago.

All of the cells are adjoined, and bared. There isn't any sense of privacy unless you hide behind the table in the middle. Each cell has a multipurpose table in the middle. It could be for sleeping, sitting, or whatever torture methods the Capitol might want to use on you while in your cell. Straps are built into the top surface to hold you down. I can only hope that whatever West wants to do to me, it doesn't include torture. A peaceful death is what I prefer, but being here I know that that isn't an option. It's more of a wish.

After sitting in my cell for what seems like hours but is only minuets, with no one but me in the torture gym, I decide to take in my surroundings. When Peeta and I were here I don't know how long ago, we were in a rush and I didn't take the time to take in the gym and all it offered.

The whole torture gym is rectangular. There is a line of cells right across the middle, dividing the gym basically into two squares the same size. The passage between the two middle cells in the line, allows for people to pass through to the left or right side.
There is really only one word to describe the gym. Big.

My cell is somewhere on the right side of the line, but not very close to the end.

On the right half of the room, there are the desks and tables. Potions, needles, metal sticks, and other torturing devises are scattered on their surfaces. On that side is where the elevator and training room is. The door to the training room is closed with a blind over the window. And the besides the training room that West is in most the time, and the elevator, there aren't any other doors on that side. Basically it's filled with desks and such. I'm kind of glad that the mutts don't exit the training room. I want to see them. I don't even want to see West, but I know that won't happen. He's bound to come and greet me at some point.

There are some other odd things on that side that I don't want to know what do, so I ignore them.

On the left half of the gym is the mutation section with the glass box. There are doors that line the wall, one of which is called torture room #2 that the mutts were in before they went to the training room. but that's the only one labeled. Each of the doors are spread out maybe 20 feet apart. And even though I can't see in, I can tell that the rooms are fairly big. Big enough to have a few people tortured at once. Probably one room is for hijacking. That room is where they would of brought Peeta after weeks of torture.

Peeta.

My friend, partner, lover, husband. I told Pollux to go because I didn't want Peeta to be trapped here, tortured again. I wanted the best for my family. For Panem. Now that I'm here, they can kill me and Panem will be safe. I'm sure that's what West plans. I heard West say it to his own army for pete's sake. That if I deliver myself to him, they wouldn't attack the districts. Surly he wouldn't lie to his mutation army.

I shouldn't be worried. Willow and Rye have their Dad. And I'm sure Haymitch will be able to help him out some days when I'm dead. Maybe 2 or 3 days a week when he isn't drunk. Plus I think that without me in Panem, the Capitol won't want to rebel. They won't have anything to be against. I have always been the main cause for them to get angry since the 74th games because I triggered the rebellion with Nighlock berries, so I think it would be for the better with me gone. I don't want my kids growing up with a mother that is always endangering them by the Capitol. When Thaumaturge West kills me, it will be for the better. Even if I didn't voluntarily chose to be here at this time. I'm sure Peeta and I would of resolved something that includes me sacrificing myself. I have nothing to worry about.