The Crap Hetalia Book

Hetalia Orphanage Part 3

Mathias got to the top of the stairs and crouched down next to Tino, who sat on the top step, staring at the door. There were voices on the other side, loud ones, but no one had come in yet. They were probably still trudging down the drive. Then, the door burst open and a kid of about ten years old flew down the corridor carrying a box of tomatoes over his head and laughing, followed by two older, one who was screaming 'give that back you jerk bastard', and the other shouting 'don't kill him, please don't Lovino.'

Emil appeared next to Lukas who stood behind Mathias and stared down. "Who're they?" he asked. "They're very loud?"

"Huh?" Mathias turned round and grinned. "They're your new house mates. And yes, they're very loud."

"A bit like you then?" Tino grinned, stood up and walked down the stairs.

"I'm not loud" Mathias shouted after him.

"Are" Berwald said, following Tino. Mathias grumbled something and then wandered after them.

Who was standing in the hall, collecting bags that had been thrown on the floor, and people were still coming in. "How are you coping?" she said, turning to them and smiling.

"Good" Lukas said.

"They're great" Mathias gave her the thumbs up. "They have us to help them round so they couldn't be better."

"I beg to differ." A well built boy with slicked back hair turned to them. "Ludwig" he said and then went down the hall to where there was a crash.

"Damn it" Who cursed. "I'll be back in a minute." She stormed down the hall shouting and went into the kitchen, still shouting.

"It's too loud" Emil muttered.

"Aw, it's not that bad" Mathias said, putting his arm round his shoulders. Emil glared at the floor and shrugged the arm off.

"Hey Tino" a boy with glasses said, coming up behind them.

"Hey Eduard" Tino grinned, then turned to Lukas and Emil. "This is Eduard, you know, the tech genius."

Eduard blushed. "I... I wouldn't go that far but..."

"But... you're a nerd" another boy with shoulder length brown hair put a hand on his shoulder. "We understand, and we accept you for who you are."

"Yup" a smaller boy said, appearing at his other side.

"This is Toris and Raivis" Tino said, pointing to each one in turn.

"You're the one with the cross-dressing boy friend?" Emil asked.

Toris choked and spluttered. "I... he... he's not..."

"He is" Mathias smirked, trying to hold back laughter.

"You can't go round saying stuff like that" Lukas muttered to Emil, who blinked and nodded.

"You're the new guys right?" Eduard grinned.

Lukas nodded.

"Yeah, Lukas and Emil" Mathias said.

"Well... good luck" Raivis sighed. "It can be crazy around here for the first few days... weeks. I'm still struggling to get used to it."

"Way to make them feel better" Eduard put a hand on Raivis' head and he flinched.

"Please don't do that. It reminds me of Ivan" he muttered.

"Oh my god, you're the new dudes." A boy with glasses, brown-blonde hair and a strand of hair that stuck up ran over. "Time's up hanging with these dull dudes, let me introduce you to everyone." He grabbed Lukas' wrist, on second thoughts grabbing Emil's too and dragged them down the hall into the kitchen. "I'm Alfred by the way."

It was crowded with people, all shouting and arguing about... nothing in particular it seemed. The boy with the box of tomatoes had lost it now, to the boy who had been chasing him and was now standing on the table with him, fighting to get it back, with the other one standing next to them, talking normally. Someone with a ponytail and a wok was clearly threatening to hit someone with it and in the corner, a boy with completely red hair was smoking with a can of beer in one hand.

"Hey, hey, hey dudes? Dudes" Alfred shouted, getting the attention of a couple nearer the front.

"They can't hear you Al" a quiet voice said from next to him. Another boy with glasses and a long curl materialised out of thin air. "I'm Mathew."

"Who said they can't hear me?" Alfred asked him and then shouted louder. "HEY, DUUUDDEESS, SERIOUSLY. HEY."

The room fell into a awkward silence, all eyes turned to them and Lukas felt the sudden urge to hide behind Emil. He didn't like being in the centre of attention.

"These are the new dudes, Lukas and Emil" Alfred said, still shouting even though the noise was all gone.

"Hi" Lukas muttered, raising a hand. Emil just kind of stared forwards in some kind of paralysed shock.

Then the room erupted back into noise, people shouting out greetings or names. Emil jumped out of his paralysation and grabbed Lukas' hand behind his back, then let go almost immediately.

"Yeah" Mathias said, appearing next to him. "This is our quiet welcome as you've already been introduced to the Baltics and then three of us, and Alfred. He's the loudest." He turned to the rest of the room and raised his hands. "Alright, now let them go, seriously, they still have unpacking to do."

A few murmured nods and then they left the crowded kitchen for the airy hall, which had seemed slightly claustrophobic to Lukas at first.

"We've finished unpacking you know?" he said.

"Yeah, but do you really want to be in the room with that lot again?" Tino said from the stairs. "They're loud, and it's best if you get used to it slowly instead of all at once."

"They're too loud" Emil agreed.