War Torn {A Naturo Fanfic}

Page 27

"Don't talk to me." Maeko snapped at me.

"That statement wasn't exactly directed to anyone." I told her and pulled out someone's left over take out. I knew they were hogging the good stuff.

I heated up and ignored Maeko going off on me. I had gotten very good at toning people out over the years. That wasn't so good when I was in high school because I missed many lectures, but it isn't like high school students aren't eighty percent self taught anyway.

I sat down next to Kakuzu and ate, still ignoring Maeko, until I was ready to tear her arm off again. "Maeko, I hope you realize I haven't heard a word you've said this entire time." I informed her and continued eating. She got up and left, which was nice.

It was silent for a while and suddenly it was just like Kakuzu and I were fighting again. There was a pause before any action was taken.

"I wouldn't have killed you." He said finally.

"I hadn't thought you would have until the threads dug in." I told him without looking up from my food.

"You have a good heart Etsuko. It's powerful and war torn. If you were anyone else I would have taken it without hesitation." He said seriously. There was another pause and that sunk in. I didn't think my heart was good. Powerful and war torn maybe, but not good. I didn't follow my heart anymore. I followed impulse. If I followed my heart I would have done what I told my father I would do. I've disgraced him and Juryoku.

"You made me remember something today, Kakuzu. My memory still isn't the best and I have a very basic view of my past. There' aren't many instances that strike me. When you had me stuck in the air and Juryoku was bound I thought I was done, but then I remembered." I blinked the tears back, refusing to cry.

"I remembered my father and when he told me what Juryoku was for and how it worked. He told me it protected the thing the wielder believed in; things like ourselves, family, honor. He told me Juryoku would be mine someday." I swallowed the lump in my throat. "My father was a good man who died fighting for good things. I got Juryoku and I undid everything he fought for. I let my sisters get taken away, killed my grandmother, slaughtered innocent people, and became the ruin of Yugakure. I let myself get turned into a monster and now there's no turning back." It was unbearable to have to say any of that.

"Etsuko, if you were a monster none of that would bother you." Kakuzu told me before getting up and leaving me on my own.

I thought about what he said and ate the food that wasn't really mine. All I could do was think things over. What would my father think if he knew I willingly joined the Akatsuki? He fought against them and did everything to keep them away from us. What would he think about my reliance on three men who happen to be s-ranked criminals?

I thought about that every day for a week while I fought the rest of the Akatsuki. I was right about beating Deidara easily and though I hadn't been sure Tobi and Zetsu weren't too much of a challenge either. Sasori poisoned me and Itachi tortured me from the inside. They both won. When I fought Kisame I think it ended up a drawl. Rolling around on the ground stabbing at each other after four hours wasn't exactly getting us anywhere. I beat Konan, Hidan, and Chiya.

I was "helping" Kisame with his push-ups again and reading a book I had borrowed from Kakuzu. It was incredibly rare and I had been reading it non-stop since breakfast. I cooked with one hand and my eyes locked on a book unrelated to what I was doing.

"Are you ever going to stop reading that thing?" Kisame asked me.

"Not until I'm done. I used to read all the time. It's nice to forget reality exists and become someone else for a little while." I told him distantly as I kept reading.