YOURS SINCERELY • newtmas au

To: Minho

Minho,

Okay. So maybe you've opened this letter thinking, "Oh, what cheesy klunk has this poor shank written to me this year?"

You did, didn't you?

I knew it. I knew it.

You're such an asshole, Minho.

But maybe that's what I like about you. Maybe I like how you're an asshole to everyone, because there's something sincere about your attitude, something honest about it. And I bloody appreciate that.

I wanted to say these things to you because I feel I don’t tell you them enough. I’ve found it hard writing about you properly before because of everything we’ve been through. Everything we’ve had to work our way through and everything we’ve overxome. And sometimes I don’t tell you these things because I’m just bloody no good at compliments. But this isn’t just a compliment. This is a thank you. You’ll never know how much I appreciate you, how happy I am to have you by my side.

The last eleven have been a series of ups and downs, but somehow you’ve kept me sane. I don’t want to spend this time writing paragraph after paragraph about how much I appreciate you. Because you know I much I really, truly, bloody adore you. I just want to thank you for these things, that I didn’t take the opportunity to do so before. Maybe out of pride, maybe out of embarrassment, or maybe because when it comes to talking, I can never manage to get my words out. So Minho, thank you.

Thank you for supporting me and encouraging me to do the things I'm great at.

Thank you for being there when I felt I had no one else.

Thank you for trying to understand how I feel, even when you didn’t need to.

Thank you for being by my side at my support group, and applauding me louder than everyone else in the room when I introduced myself.

Thank you for insisting to stay in my hospital room three years ago when I bloody asked you to leave, knowing that I really needed company.

Thank you for reminding me every day that I’m still your best friend.

Thank you for patting me when I cry, and stroking my back when I sleep.

And thank you for hugging me in public when people can't stand looking at me. In fact, thank you for hugging me when I can’t even stand looking at myself.

I want to say thank you for standing by me for these past eleven years, and for making my problems your problems.

For calling me "Newton" and making it seem funny, and telling me that the scars on my arms and legs make me look cool.

And lastly, on a more serious note.

Thank you for your endless patience, for accepting my scars as a part of me.

Thank you for staying, when you could’ve walked away. I know a bloody lot of people would have.

So, yeah. I think perhaps you should take note of all these thank yous, because you'll never hear me being so polite again.

Oh, remember what you told me the first time we met? When I asked you what you were doing in the snow?

"I hate the world. It's so messed up. That's why I'm making my own."

That was eleven year ago. Wow, time sure flies fast, eh? Soon we'll be graduating, soon we'll be bloody thrown into the world, where everything is a lot more raw and a lot more real. And maybe then we'll part ways. Maybe then we'll realize that all this time, we were just kids playing around in the snow.

But for now, I'm going to thank you, Minho. Thank you for sticking through thick and thin. Thank you for filling in the gaps I lack. Thank you for making me a part of your world.

Merry Christmas!

Love,
Newt