Look into your eyes, I see that you loved me.
But I broke your heart and let you go
Regrets, frustrations filled me because I hurt someone like you.
Now you're here, my eyes sparks like diamond. The way I look at you never seems to change, never see...
I'm standing exactly where the first time I'd recognized her. I heaved a sighed. I missed her a lot. I missed her smile, her eyes that glows every time were together, I missed everything about her. I'd still regret those moments and days that I wasted because I was blinded by the fact that I don't like her.
Yeah, She's not my type of girl, she's too probinsyana, she doesn't even fixed herself nicely, she's a nerd wearing her thick glasses with her big bag, she's a bit chubby. She didn't even know how to fix her hair better. She's far behind from my ideal girl but that was before.
I admitted that I'm a fucking flirt asshole that wants to flirt with other girls especially beautiful girls but I've had this urged to flirt with her. I'm just playing around but she told me one day that she loves me. I thought that time that my charm didn't work on her. I'd used her, I made her as my girlfriend because of the things I need for her. She's smart and I'm not quite smart as hers. I'm using her for my projects, assignments and even an instant tutor.
I'd hanged out with other girls and she saw me. She cried that time and I thought that she was mad at me but she accepted me again. I still continued doing my hobby, partying with other girls. Because that time I'm in-denial for my feelings for her. I'd hurt emotionally because I don't like this feeling. I don't want to see her crying because of me. I'd hurt her in every emotional way I can.
Until one day I realized that this strange feeling of mine blooms even stronger and I can't fight it. She's acting cold at me and I just neglected it. She's staying away from me and because I thought that this feeling I'm feeling that time and right now is just a pity but I was wrong. All I can see every time I closed my eyes is her. I can't even sleep at night because of the thought of her crying at me. I'm in love with her. And I thought that everything was alright for me to tell to her that I love her only for me to realise that I've lost her. I've just lost the one who truly loves me for who I am. I've just lost the person that all she does was love me at the times that I'm giving and showing shit at her. I've just lost the one I loved and it's hurt like a fucking bitch.
I loved her and I don't care what people will gonna say about it. I'm the one of few lucky people who can see her other side. She's lovely and I don't know what's in me for me to not be able to saw it. Her smile is contagious and natural that makes her more beautiful. She's kind and smart. Every time I looked at her my world stood still and I felt like I'm complete man. She may have at least flaws in herself but it doesn't matter. I want to experience those flaws in her with me. I'm lucky to have her and I will do everything to make her mine. The road would be bumpy and not easy for me for her heart. Wait me, Mimi Rose Valdez, this time I'm gonna show you how I love you.
I went straight to my home. I considered the apartment I'm staying is my home because she lived her once here. I remembered how I felt when I'm finally going to make things right when she left me and gave up on me. The pain was too real to handle and I'm still suffering from it. I still regret those days that she's inch away from me, she's dragging herself to me and all I can do is to bitch around her.
I closed my fist and I hated myself for that. I'm a lost man. I've became lost even before she's not in my sight. Since I'm a lost man, all I need to do is to proved and to feel for myself and to everyone that I'm complete. Then she appears, she made me felt that I'm a lost man that's why I don't want her for myself. But I was wrong she made me complete.
I closed my eyes and a flash of hers is playing in my mind.
"Huy Seb, wag ka ngang ngumiti dyan sige ka maadict ako sayo" she said. I couldn't control myself but to laugh.
"Ok lng! Ngayon ko lng narealise na nakakaaddict pala ako" I said then I winked at her. She winked me back at me at she's cute.
"Hala sige , kain ka na nga" she said.
We just continued our dinner and I couldn't take my eyes on her. Weird to act like this to the so called not my ideal girl but it makes me happier.
As soon the dinner was over, she cleaned all of the plates that were used and the table we ate. I've got the chance to check on her. She's sexy a bit, she's different to other girl I'd fling before. She's probably an Ideal girl to guys but that's not me.
"Goodbye loves" she said. I'm on the door and I stared at her
"Goodbye too" I said. I meant that I really want to disappear because my feelings were getting strange.
"I love you" she said. My heart beats fast as she said those words. It's like there's a lump in my throat that I couldn't able to speak.
I just leaved her behind and go somewhere else.
I opened my eyes and I roughly rubbed my hair.
"I love you, I love you , I LOVE YOU MIMI!" I shouted because of the frustration I'm feeling right now.
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"Bakit hindi ko nasabe sayo na mahal kita at seryoso ako, I'm fucking hate myself for that. I'm sorry" I cried.
It's still haunts me down even it was 5 years I've never seen her. I'm fucking love her and that's true. I'm willing to do everything to bring her back.
I heard my phone ringing. I immediately answered it
"Hey Bro, I found her" Damien said, one of my friends
The excitements went up that crept inside me.
"Where?" I replied instantly.
"Actually I really don't know her address but based on what I've read in her credentials she belongs to our partner's company." He said
"That's alright dude. Thank you, I owe you a lot" I said
"That's ok, win her back and don't be an asshole anymore ok" Pinangaralan pa ako.
"Ok, ok. I was an asshole and not anymore you don't need to mention it" I said. It's somehow irritates the hell out of me.
Narinig ko siyang tumawa.
"OK asshole haha just kidding bye now" he hanged up.
I just frowned and thrown my phone at the bed. My mood suddenly changes by remembering what he said that he found her. Mimi, even though were been apart for five years, destiny really bring us back and I don't want to slip away from me again, not any more.
