Getting Through The Dark (Harry Styles Fanfiction)

Chapter 11: Not Coming Back

Being with Harry has really made me open my eyes to everything that's going on. I know that I'm a mess, and being here with him, has helped me to realize that I'm a complete mess.

Don't get me wrong, I'm still craving drugs, to the max. But I smoke a cigarette whenever the craving gets too much for me to handle. I know that a cigarette isn't exactly healthy, but it's far more better than cocaine. Harry would always make sure that I was comfortable. He would come in the guest room, and cuddle me up with the warmest blanket that he had, and kiss my forehead and tuck me in the bed. I've never been a sucker for sweet gestures, but I sure was whenever Harry done it.

When I look into your eyes, it's like watching the night sky.

Or a beautiful sunrise, there's so much they hold

And just like them old stars, I see that you've come so far.

To be right where you are.

Well, how old is your soul? Well I won't give up on us.

Even if the skies get rough, I'm giving you all my love.

I'm still looking up.

I heard a muffled voice from the room. I turned to see what the noise was coming from. I looked up to see Harry singing. His voice was really beautiful, and I could feel myself drifting to sleep, fast.

Before I went into a deep slumber, I heard Harry sing an important line.

I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily

I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make

Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use

The tools and gifts we got, yeah, we got a lot at stake. 

"I'm not giving up on you, Audi." Harry spoke softly into my hair, bringing me closly to him.

***

I woke up to notice that Harry wasn't in the room with me anymore. I looked around for my phone, unlocking it to see the time. 6:56 pm

I wasn't asleep for too long, maybe about 3 hours.

I quickly got out of the bed, walking out of the guest room. I heard Harry talking to someone on the phone. I wasn't trying to be nosy, but I wondered who he was talking to. I made my way closer to the kitchen, pressing my body to the wall, trying to not be noticed.

"Yeah, she's still doing fine... " He trailed off, his voice becoming softer, "I'm trying here, to get in. But she's not letting me. She just pushes me away even more. I want to see her to better. But she's not... Yeah, mate. I don't know what to do next. I mean, yeah, we've fucked already....No! I'm not going to use her. No. Yeah, alright, I remember... Talk to you later, ya. Alright. OKAY, I heard you. Later."

I wonder who he was talking to? I'm not going to get in the way of things, but clearly he's told someone of what he does know. I have to be careful with what I tell him. He could be telling these things to anyone. I don't even know any of his friends. Whenever he would leave for UNI, he wouldn't tell me when he was coming back. Sometimes he would be out for hours at a time.

He would usually come back later at night, and he would be drunk. It didn't really seem like Harry would be the kind of person to get drunk.

I know he was at a party, whenever I agreed to come home with him, but I didn't assume him to be a big drinker.

I guess you could never judge people by their looks, or the way they act. Sometimes people just put on a front. I just hoped that Harry wasn't hiding anything from me.

I made my way down to the bathroom, stripping my clothes, and locking the door. A hot shower could really do me some good right now.

I stepped into the shower, turning the hot water all the way up, letting the water flood over my body. The hot water made me relax instantly. I started to wash my hair, and shave. I had a lot on my mind. Why was he on the phone with someone, talking about me? I hoped he hasn't told them anything that I have. I told Harry about the time I was raped by Jake's father, and I've never told a soul that.

I was interrupted by my thoughts, with a knock at the door.

"Hold on, I'm almost done."

"Let me in, Audi." I heard Harry's muffled voice behind the bathroom door.

"No, I'm almost done. I'm getting out right now." Shit. I didn't even grab a towel. Great, now I have to open the door and ask Harry to get me one.

"Shit, Harry. I forgot a towel, can you bring me one?"

I hoped he wouldn't give me problems about it.

"Nope, gotta come out. Then I'll getcha one." 

I knew it. I sighed, and stepped out of the shower, turning the water off. I opened the door slowly, peaking from behind. "Okay, I'm out now. Can I have that towel?"

He was smirking at me, he put his hand on the door handle, pushing the door back.

He stepped into the bathroom, and pushed the door closed.

I covered myself up with my hands, and crossed my feet together, hunching over.

"Harry! You said you would get me a towel."

"Yeah, well I lied." He smirked, walking closer to me.

"I'm serious Harry! Get away." I pushed him back with one hand, using the other to try to cover myself.

Which wasn't working, by the way!

"Who were you on the phone with?" His face dropped as soon as I asked him the question.

He shuffled around a little bit before answering.

"Erhm, It was no one. Now, come on and I'll get you a towel."

-----------------------------------------------

He was really getting on my nerves tonight. He wouldn't tell me who he was on the phone with. Whenever I brought it up, he would just brush it off by asking me a question in return. It was really frustrating to me. What does he remember? He said he remembered something whenever he was on the phone. I just hoped he wasn't using me to get this information out of me, to only use it against me later.

I wasn't going to give up just yet, I'm going to still keep my walls up. I haven't been one to let someone in so easily, and I'm not going to start now. Sure, Harry is a great guy, but I'm not going to give into him just because of that reason.

"Will you please tell me who you were on the phone with now?" I asked him, looking down at our intertwined fingers.

"No. I'm not going to. Now will you just drop it?"

"No. I'm not going to just drop it." I moved my hand away from him, and stood up from the couch.

"Please, just drop it Audrina." 

Ouch.

"I heard you talking about me.."

That made him mad, I guess.

"You were eavesdropping? It's none of your fucking concern anyways, what I do. Or who I talk to. You don't have to be such an uptight, nosy, bitch all the time." He was screaming by now. He just stepped closer to me.

"You know what, You're right. I'm leaving. I might be back tonight, tomorrow, or in a couple days. I don't know." I spat, causing him to flinch.

"Please don't leave, Audi. I didn't mean to snap at you."

"No, Harry. I'm going out."

I ran up to the room and changed into a short black dress, and some heels. I added some makeup, and perfume, and walked down the stairs. I didn't even bother to look at Harry on my way out.

I knew where I was going, and I knew what I was doing tonight.

I'm getting laid, drunk, and I'm going to do something that I haven't done in a long time; drugs.