Devotion

C14: I'm Sorry

The day after was hard.

Steve spent most of it by his mother's side, and the rest next to me. He followed her around as she completed errands for when she left, and checked around the apartment for minor things... But the whole time, even though he helped her, I saw it in his eyes that he wasn't ready for her to leave.

By the time he finally left her side, he was exhausted and so was I. We fell asleep in matter of minutes and I hoped that he would be okay the next day...

But he wasn't.

When I woke up this morning, the sun shone on his bed, but he wasn't there.

I pulled myself awake and searched the room, but he wasn't there.

I knew he wouldn't leave, so when I opened the bedroom door and found him sitting in front of the front door, it wasn't really a surprise. I walked down the hallway to where he was sitting and sat down beside him.

"I figured I wouldn't find you in bed this morning."

"You guessed right." He whispered back.

"What are you doing?"

"Waiting for my mom to leave."

"Why here?"

"So I can block the door and make her stay."

"God Steve... I have never heard you sound so much like a child."

"It's worth a shot." He retorted.

"It won't work."

"I don't care." I heard him mumble.

I threw my head back against the door, and as I did Sarah came out from her bedroom in her work dress. Steve turned to face her, but closed his eyes immediately after, trying not to let his emotions cloud his judgment like mine do.

"Good morning." She said to us almost sorrowfully.

"Not really." Steve mumbled.

I looked over to him, which only resulted in him turning away from me.

"Good morning Mrs. Rogers." I whispered.

"Why are you boys up so early?"

"What do you think... Steve wanted to see you go."

"No I don't." He stated softly.

"Right... Well he wanted to see you then."

She nodded and bowed her head down in regret as she grabbed a bag from off the couch. I knew what was coming, but Steve still believed he could stop her. She took more steps towards the door, and as she did, Steve started standing up in front of it.

"Steve... Please honey. I don't want to leave you like this."

"You don't have to leave at all." He muttered looking at her.

"I do. And I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

She reached out and hugged him, which caused him to lighten up a little bit. He hugged her back and I could see how hard it was for him to watch as the second parent left.

"I'll be back. I promise." She said as she kissed his head.

"And you... You better keep your promise." She pointed at me from behind his back.

I nodded my head. She let go of him and slid the bag over her shoulders. He stood in front of the door as she reached out for the handle.

"Steve let me go."