You Chose Mine

Chapter 9

"I've been having a really good week" I told Aunty. Her heart monitor replied in steady beats, "We had a full moon day yesterday, but I forgot to buy a lottery ticket". I could hear her voice once more 'you could have been a millionaire you silly duffer!' I chuckled. "I know, I know" I smiled to her. "The business is going really well" I told her.

"Ever since I've met Luke everything has been so good"

"But, he's going out with Kennedy tonight" I lost eye contact with her body as I fiddled with the end of my dress. 'Shouldn't that be you?' I heard her voice say. I shook my head "Kennedy asked him before we could start anything. I've known him for nearly a month but I like the way things are now" I said. 'I've known you since you were born, don't try to lie to me' her voice scolded. "I like him more than I care to admit, but I'm too chicken to do anything about it. I may be honest but I can't be when it comes to feelings" I find it physically impossible to move my mouth when I talk about my feelings sometimes, especially love.

I'd rather keep it to myself, there my problems not anyone else's.

I checked the time, "He should have picked her up by now" I mumbled. 'Go have a life, I'll still be here tomorrow' I heard her laugh.

"I can only hope"

*

I sat in my car as I listened to one of my aunties favourite songs, 'Beauty is only skin deep' by the Temptations. It's one of my favourites too; she was very diverse when it came to music and such a free spirit. Then I had to be the idiot that begged to go out that night.

why could have the rock hit me? Hit my skull and me be in the hospital instead of her. It was my fault, just like my mother said.

"It's always my fault" I whispered.

I wiped away the tears that began to fall from my eyes. I jumped from my car while ignoring any passers that paid attention to whimpers that escaped my mouth. I made my way to my door as I saw Ashton standing there. I turned around in disbelief as I wiped away another tear that rolled down my cheek.

"Shannon?" I heard his voice approaching me. I turned to see him with concern written all over his face, "What's wrong?" he asked.

"What are you doing here?"

"I asked first" he replied. I slouched as I took a deep breath. 'I trust him' I said to myself, 'I trust him enough to tell him the truth'. I gestured him to follow me into the apartment, I put my bag down and switched my phone off I didn't need Kennedy texting me half way through this conversation.

"You have to promise not to tell anyone this" I said to him as we both sat on the couch, he nodded knowing I was serious. "This isn't my apartment, it's my aunties." I confessed first, he stayed calm and content. Somehow knowing I'll need someone strong enough to watch me break down my walls. "And the reason she isn't here, i-is because..." I found myself struggling to tell him the truth, struggling to accept that the fact that once I say it out loud it becomes real. "I can't remember if you were here or not but about a year ago there was a story on the news about how a man was drunk and began throwing rocks onto the highway and it hit the right hand back seat window of a car..."

"And a woman got hurt?" he finished, I nodded. "And that woman is your..." I nodded once more; I could see that he didn't know how to react to that. "Is she alright?" he quietly asked, I shook my head before I felt a warm tear roll down my cheek.

"She's in a coma, she has been since the accident" I confessed finally, and in all honesty it felt good to talk to someone about it.

"I'm so sorry" he placed his hand over mine in an attempt to comfort me; I'm not ashamed to say that it did work.

It's been a long time since someone's comforted me.

"'Runaway' was her store, but in her will it was passed on to me. I got a lawyer to sign everything, to legal change the name of the store then sign it over to me when I was 16" I told him.

"16?" he repeated surprised.

I nodded once more before he moved closer to me, "I had my time to grieve and then it was back to work, that's when I started designing my own clothes" I said, "It was also the beginning of the 5 seconds of summer range" I added. I wiped away the tears as I looked to Ashton, "You guys really helped me through a tough time and you continue too. I just wanted to genuinely thank you for that" I placed my hand over his, "You guys saved my mental state from going to a very dark place, saved me from going back home and saved me from turning into someone different" I looked into his eyes as I confessed how much his band meant to me, only to see water sitting on the rims of his eyes. 

"Thank you so much" I cried as he pulled me into a hug. He held me close to his body as I cried quietly into his shoulder; he now knows why I work so hard, why I come out with new things more often than I should.

It's all a distraction.

"What about your parents?" he asked quietly. I pulled back before playing with the hem of my dress.

"When I was ten my parents got into a massive fight, on a scale of one to ten it would have been a thirty" I explained. He moved closer until his side was pressed against mine, "I couldn't understand why it happened, but I found out my father had been hiding something from us". He took hold of my hand letting me know his listening.

"He was gay" I said to him.

I felt the awkward tension in the air before I let out a small giggle, "You don't have to be so quiet" I said to him, "You can laugh at that, I've learnt too" he gave me a small smile before letting me continue. "It was the most random thing in the entire world but it broke everything. My mother felt used and dirty, but she just thought he was in touch with his 'feminie' side" I chuckled again. "Once he came out to us, we were all so confused about everything but I just turned angry. Then suddenly, my mother told me that he found out he was gay because he and my netball couch had feelings towards each other" I heard Ashton laugh as I looked up to him.

"What?" I asked.

"I thought your parents had died or something..." I laughed along with him.

"No their just miles away"

"So you moved because your father turned gay?" he asked. "Sort of... I was confused, angry, and upset at everything. He seemed to go on in life like nothing ever happened. He thought I would be more accepting but I found it hard to" I explained. "I have nothing against being gay; I mean I've had gay employees that we're the best people ever. But, he sort of just threw me into a loop thinking I'd be happy if he brought over my old netball couch and introduced him as his boyfriend all of a sudden." I looked to Ashton as water formed on the rims of my eyes, "I couldn't do it" I confessed once more. He embraced me once again repeating in my ear 'it's alright, everything's going to be alright'.

"Please don't tell Luke, Calum or Michael this. Even Kennedy and Derek don't know. I don't even know how I got the courage to tell you, but please..." I begged, he nodded.

"But now I'm actually gonna be worried about you" he told me; "It's actually really not safe for someone your age to be alone in this city" I smiled.

"I've been looking after myself for a year, trust me I'll be fine" He let go of my hand and increased the distance between us.

"Why did you come here tonight?" I asked him, "Luke was out, Calum is spending the night with his dad and Michael is playing GTA for the rest of the night, so I just thought I'd keep you company" I smiled to him, "Why are you so nice to me?" I asked, he shrugged to me in responds "I just like how real you are when I'm with you, you're a really cool girl" I felt my cheeks heat up.

"If Luke doesn't do something soon, I might" he said to me. I laughed as I wondered if there was any seriousness in that statement.