You Chose Mine

Chapter 34

I heard distant murmuring as my eyes slowly peeled open. "You're not good for her" I heard one voice say. My head turned to the direction of the front door when I saw my mother's figure blocking most of Luke's tall build. I swung my legs off the arm rest of the lounge chair and pushed myself up, "What's going on?" I asked "What do you mean his 'not good for me'?" I questioned as all attention turned to me. "Shannon, ever since I got here all the trouble you've been in is because of him" she said, "Oh! and who told you that? Kennedy? Derek? because last time I checked I'm your daughter and Luke is the guy I'm dating" I said. "Shannon, I'm looking out for you. You've been hurt!" she exclaimed.

"But not by Luke!" I retaliated.

"You have no excuse for blaming Luke, you just want someone to blame that isn't me" I added. "What are you saying?" she asked defensively. "Shannon, stop" Luke said. "You want to believe that I'm this sweet, innocent girl you rose for 10 years and then handed off to my aunty the moment I began to have a voice."

"Luke is the best thing that has ever happened to me, his good for me in every way possible. You don't know him, you don't know us, but sadly you don't know me"

'You don't know me' those words left a bad tasting in my mouth. But the look on my mothers face was much worse, I looked down as I covered my mouth.

But it's true, she doesn't know me. Apart from her 3 day visits every 6 months since I've been gone has given her no insight to how I really am, who I grew up to be, who I am growing up to be. I'm not innocent, at least not as innocent as she would like to think I am. I've gotten drunk, I've made out with guys and girls and I've done some things I'm not proud of. I'm not the little 10 year old she passed on, I'm her 17 year old daughter who owns a clothing store and now has grown up problems. She needs to realise that.

"I'm sorry... but it's true" I mumbled. I walked back into the apartment and picked up my bag and slid it onto my shoulder. "I'm going out for a while" I told her, she walked away with a hand over her mouth as if she refused to talk to me at this time. I felt a wave of guilt wash over me as I closed the door on my emotional mother.

"Shannon, you shouldn't have done that" Luke said. "It had to be said" I told him as I began to walk away from the door. "But that's your mother" he continued to defend her "She only wants you safe", I turned to him as tears weld up in my eyes "She handed me off to an aunty hours away from her and then comes back into my life and decides it's okay to pick on someone I love." Luke's silence scared me, but I knew he was listening. "I'm sick and tired of people making me feel guilty for loving you... it's gotten to the point where some days I believe it and I can't look at you" I confessed. "To the point of me believing that loving you is the worst possible thing I could do, and me being with you is a sin against nature!" I clasped my arms around me as I felt my body breaking down before Luke. My breaths came out hard as I stuttered to find oxygen. "I don't deserve you" I whispered, Luke's arms wrapped around me and pulled me close to his chest, "I'm so s-sorry" I cried "I put you in the middle of a whole lot of s-shit..." I stuttered to apologise to him as he squeezed me. "Anything you go through I will go through with you" he whispered over my cries. "Your problems are my problems now" he added, I let out one last loud cry before wrapping my arms around him.

"I love you" he whispered.

I pulled back as I struggled to find a solid breath, the kind of truth I found in his eyes scared me. A part from what I thought I heard that time in my apartment this was the first time I've heard him say the words 'I', 'Love' and 'You' in the same sentence directed to me. It was a pleasent sound, and it brought so much relief but oddly enough it brought fear.

I re-rested my head on his chest, "I'm yours" he spoke once more. "Be mine?" he asked, I felt another wave of confusion to wash over me. "What?" I asked. He cupped my face in his hands as he gently swiped his thumbs under my eyes, wiping away the last of the tears that had fallen from my eyes. "Be mine?" he repeated, "This isn't exactly where I wanted to ask you, but I don't really want to wait any longer" a small smile spread across his face. I'd be an idiot to say anything besides 'yes', "Yes" I said. I nodded in confirmation as a smile finally spread across my face "Yes" I repeated. His lips crashed to mine as the passion he had radiated through me, only for me to return the same amount back.