fixing the unfixable -phan neko (BoyXBoy)

Chapter 30- The voices in my head

Phil's P.O.V

"Hi, Chris." I sighed into the phone, not realizing how much I had actually missed him until now.

"Hi." He replied and I could hear the smile in his voice.

"I've missed you so much." I spoke quietly, fighting back a few tears.

'Weakling.' I heard a voice sounding a lot like Jason's  say inside my head, causing my breath to hitch.

~Anything written with ' ' around it is what is said in Phil's head, not to be mistaken with anything with " " Which is what is said out loud.~

This hadn't happened in a while, even during my torture I hadn't heard a thing. I thought it had finally stopped.

"Phil?" Dan said, giving me a small tap with a worried expression as he snapped me out of my thoughts.

'Pathetic' Jason spat and I shook my head slightly, trying to ignore it.

"Did you say anything, Chris?" I asked in a calm voice to hide my pain, knowing he had just heard the interaction between Dan and I.

"Yeah, but I'll tell you as soon as we get back to Dan's." Chris continued to speak excitedly, bringing back some of the happiness I had previously been feeling.

'Worthless' he spoke again, destroying my mood.

I gave a gentle shake of my head once again, too small to notice, and put on another fake smile.

"Inviting yourself over again, are we?" Dan joked, obviously hearing what was just said.

"As always" He laughed over the line.

"Anyway, I'll get someone to come and pick you guys up" And with that, he hung up.

I turned to Dan and passed him his phone back silently before giving him the most realistic smile I could muster up, trying to keep him from worrying about me.

It didn't work.

After a minute of standing, his eyes watching my every move, he took a hold of my hand and led me to a nearby bench. We both sat down side by side before he wrapped his arm around my waist.

'Don't let him feel how fat you are. He'll leave.'

I gently pulled Dan's arm off of me and I snuggled my head into his neck and wrapped my own arms around him, hoping it would keep him from questioning. He didn't seem to suspect anything as we sat together, waiting for Chris to arrive.

About half an hour later a blue car pulled up in front of it and a window began to lower, revealing a very animated Chris in the passenger's seat. He did a double take when seeing the mess I was but his smile never left, clearly not too shocked.

We both walked hand in hand to the car and once we stepped in, got in a similar position to what were both in while we were on the bench, but a little more stretched out.

"Oh, my dear." Chris's mum sighed but didn't say anything else.

The journey was surprisingly quiet. No one talked and the only noise came from the quiet lull of the radio, creating nothing but background music for the short ride.

Once at Dan's again, we all left the car and stepped inside. The moment I was through the doors I was smothered by a crying Chris.

'He's faking. Make him let go before he gets close enough to see how ugly you are'

I gulped, backing up slightly, but not pushing him off, knowing he needs the comfort. I squeezed my eyes shut before forcing myself to wrap my arms around him in an attempt to make him feel better, going against Jason's words.