Right Famous

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Hagrid sits back on the sofa, which sags under his weight. He begins taking things out of his pocket, placing them around his feet. First comes a kettle, then a package of sausages, followed by a poker, a teapot, several mugs, and a bottle of an unknown liquid. The mugs are all chipped and the kettle has a large dent in the side.

He takes a swig from the bottle before setting it aside. He starts the tea before moving onto to cooking the sausages. No one says a word while he works. In fact, it barely seems as if anyone breathes while he works. Soon, he's sliding the (slightly burnt) sausages off the poker. Dudley fidgets but Vernon stops him. "No, Dudley. Do not accept anything he tries to give you."

The giant chuckles darkly. "Don't yeh worry, Dursley. Yer great puddin' of a boy don' need fattenin' up anymore." He passes the sausages to Harry and I. They taste better than anything I've ever eaten before.

Harry is still peering at the hairy man. "I'm sorry, but I still don't know who you really are."

The giant takes a gulp of tea. "As I said, I'm Keeper of Keys and Grounds at Hogwarts. Yeh've got ter know all about Hogwarts?"

I shake my head. "No, we don't know anything about it. What is it?" Hagrid looks at me in disbelief. "Sorry?" I apologise questioningly.

"Sorry?" Hagrid repeats loudly, turning to the Dursleys. They shrink back further into the corner. "It's them that should be sorry. I knew yehs weren't gettin' yer letters - but ter think yehs didn't even know about Hogwarts! Fer cryin' out loud! Didn' yehs ever wonder where yer parents learnt it all?"

Harry and I glance each other. My expression probably looks identical to his own. Harry faces Hagrid and asks, "Learnt it all? Learnt what, exactly?"

"YEH DON'T KNOW?" Hagrid explodes. Harry moves back a bit and I follow suit. Hagrid leaps to his feet. His anger shakes the whole hut, causing the Dursleys to move even further into the wall. "Yer are tellin' me, that these two don' know a thing . . . about anythin'?"

I'm slightly offended. I get good grades and all that. We're not completely dull, after all. "We know some things," I say. "We can do math and all that."

"No, about our world, I mean. Yer world, my world. Yer parents world!"

"What world?" Harry pipes up.

That's when Hagrid loses it. After briefly yelling at Vernon, he finally gets so mad, he stops yelling altogether. He sits on the couch again.

Vernon suddenly finds his voice. "Stop! I forbid you to tell them anymore. I forbid you to utter another word!"

"Yeh never told them! Yeh never told them what was in the letter Dumbledore left! The letter fer Harry and Lydia!" Hagrid fumes. "I was there, I saw Dumbledore leave it. An' yeh've kept it from them all these years?"

"Kept what from us?" Harry asks eagerly.

"NOT ANOTHER WORD - I SAID, I FORBID YOU." Vernon shouts. Petunia gives a gasp.

"Yehs can both go boil yer heads," Hagrid waves his hand in their direction. I laugh and Vernon glowers at both me and Hagrid.

From his seated position on the couch, the giant leans towards my brother and I. "Harry - yer a wizard."

"A what?!" Harry gasps.

"An' Lydia. Yer a witch."

"I'm a - excuse me?" I furrow my eyebrows and scrunch my nose in confusion. Is he trying to insult us, or is he being serious?

"Yer a wizard and yer a witch, o' course," Hagrid says, simply. He sits further back into the sofa. It groans under the pressure but appears to hold up. "Once yeh's are all trained up, I bet yeh'll be mighty good ones. Just like yer mother and yer father. With parents like them, what else could yehs be? Now, 'ere's the letters yeh've been waitin' on."

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