The Life Of A Veterans Wife.

The operating room.

As I laid there while they were taking the babies out of my tummy I was scared. I looked into Raymonds eyes scared. He kissed my forehead and whispered he loved me and I was doing great. I complained that I felt alot of tugging and pressure from them maneuvering to get the babies out. Knowing my heart break because Raymond didn't know that our little boy was still in there lifeless. When I heard the sounds of my little angle baby girl cry I started to cry.

Raymond smiled and said she was beautiful. The nurse asked if he wanted to cut the cord. He went by her side and cut the cord as directed. He was then asked to move as my sweet angel had issues breathing. The neonatal team stepped in and got her into the incubator immediately. Fear rushed through me instantly. I didn't want Raymond to leave her side for a second. They stopped omg enough for me to see my precious angel and I made Raymond go with the neonatal team to be by our daughters side every step.

The doctors assured me they would make sure she was safe. They worked to retrieve my son my little baby angel whose soul now resided in heaven but his lifeless body remained in my tummy. The doctor announced his birth and time of death. They allowed me to hold him while they did my tubligation and were sewing me up. I cried...knowing Raymond should be here to say goodbye to our little tiny precious son. To share in this moment. But our baby girl needed him to be with her in the way I couldn't be. The nurse told me it was time for her to take my son away now. I cried and begged to let me keep him longer.....all of a sudden I felt sharp pains...the spinal block they had given me before surgery was starting to ware off quickly. I screamed and the doctors were alarmed.

They immediately stopped as the doctor gave the word I was put under. Waking in recovery begging my babies....