Silent Angels (L.P) [Cowritten by Roraline__Crawford]

28- I Love You

28- I Love You

Angel's POV

There has to be a way I can fix things between Harry and Rori. I feel so terrible that I would do anything just to fix their relationship. Maybe I can try to get Liam to understand that they were so happy being together.

I don't know if that would even work. Liam is stubborn as hell.

On the bright side I'm friends with Liam and kinda Louis. I don't know what Louis is to me. Like if he's a friend or enemy or both. Louis confuses me a lot.

I just want to be friends with all of the guys and Rori. I don't really care about the two sluts. They can go fuck themselves for all I care.

I wonder how the others are doing. I'm sure they are going crazy right now. I also wonder who is taking charge. Jade? Niall? Zayn? Cole... Cole is too lazy to take charge. You could ask him to do something and he'll be lazy and say it's too much work. Don't get me wrong, I love Cole as a brother, but he pisses me off most of the time.

One thing is on my mind which is if Liam still has feelings for me? Or if I still have feelings for him?

I think I do have feelings for him. Every time our hands touch, there's a spark. Everytime we look into each other's eyes, it's like we're looking into each other's souls. Everytime we kiss... It's like magic. I mean I know it's only happened once, but it's still there. Even after everything and all the time that passed.

I still love him. I love him so much that it hurts to see him with someone else. He means so much to me and I'm worried I'm going to fuck it up like I fuck up other shit. I just want him to be happy. I just hope I don't ruin things with him if we do try to get back together. If we do get back together, I don't want us to break up again. I hope everything works out. I hope everything between us works out. I hope Rori and Harry work out. I wish I wasn't such a fuckup. I don't want any of us to get hurt.

I guess being a fuckup runs in the family. All of my friends always wonder about my past, but I never told them. I didn't even tell Niall. I tell Niall everything. I tell him my feelings, and I tell him stories that happened to our gang when he wasn't in the gang. I helped him and he helped me. I had him to go to when I was stuck, upset, mad, hurt, and confused. He's always there for me and I'm always there for him.

Everyone in our gang had a bad past. People say leave the past behind you, but sometimes you can't. Well, I can't. Not when the past comes back, biting you in the ass. It sucks. It haunts me everyday and I can't do anything about it. I try and block it out, but it's still there. The memories. The pain. The screams. The nightmares. The fights. Everything is still there. In the past, there's always something there to leave a scar that you'll never forget. I try so hard to get rid of it, but I can't. I even went to therapy before I met Niall and his gang of friends. Therapy did not help at all. I thought it was going to help, but it didn't. All the therapy did was waste my time. I went to therapy for months and I thought it was helping at first, but then everything came back to me.

I never told them my past because I wasn't ready. I still am not ready to tell them. Not yet. Well, I kinda can't right now anyways. It's kinda relaxing being with Liam and his gang when there's no drama and shit. Liam doesn't know about my past either. No one does. Liam knows some bits and pieces of my past, but he doesn't know the whole story. I'm not an open book. That's why I keep my past with only me. Even when Liam and I were dating, I never told him anything.

The only people I would open up to are Liam, Niall, Zayn, and Jade. Maybe even Louis. The others, no. Louis is friendly to me and he confuses me sometimes.

When Liam and I broke up, everyone at school would say that I should go out with Niall, but I didn't because I didn't want to ruin the relationship we have. I would be okay with dating him, but if we ever broke up, I would want to be close friends with him.