Trying to Throw my Arms Around the World

In kind

In kind

“How did it end?” I asked Jill. I sat on a chair in her kitchen while she prepared a very exotic-looking rice dish. A half-empty bottle of red wine stood beside me in the most comforting manner. “With you and Sophie.”

Jill didn’t look up from the counter where she was cutting a vegetable I’d never seen before. “She had an affair. For six months. A bit too long to my liking.”

“Are you still in touch?”

“Sometimes. But only when we need to discuss practical matters. We lived together for more than four years. Lots of things get tangled up.”

“Are they together now? Sophie and her–”

“Nope. Turns out they weren’t very compatible out of the bedroom.”

“Have you ever considered taking her back?”

She turned around and held a teaspoon of sauce in front of my mouth. “Be careful, it’s hot,” she said. I blew on the spoon and felt like a fool. “The answer is yes. Every day. But my conclusion is the same every single time: I can never trust her again.”

I swallowed the sauce and started tearing up immediately, not used to dealing with that level of spiciness. “Are you trying to kill me?” I asked, while grappling for my glass of wine.

“I knew I should have made bangers and mash,” she said, grinning ear to ear. “But I wanted to show off.”

“Mission accomplished.” 

She approached me again with the spoon and this time dipped her finger in it so a large dollop of sauce clung to it. “Try it again,” she whispered. “It won’t be as bad the second time around.” I licked her finger clean, but not clean enough because everywhere she touched me with it later, it burned like hell.

“I should go,” I said, still lying flat on my back, looking for the moon outside Jill’s bedroom window. “Work in the morning.”

“Stay,” she said. “Lucy won’t mind if you look a bit frumpy tomorrow.” She turned on her side to face me and played with the silver chain around my neck. “In fact, I bet you can do just about anything and Lucy still wouldn’t mind.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Let’s just say that Lucy really likes talking about you. Very much. If it weren’t for Joan, she wouldn’t shut up about you.”

“I know she has a special fondness for me, but she’s happy with Joan now, isn’t she?”

“Biding her time, more like.”

I sat up, unnerved. “Then why did she introduce us?”

“You think that was Lucy’s idea?” Jill made a sniffing, mocking sound with her nose.

“God, I’m so sick of this endless cycle of people wanting the one person they can’t have.”

“Tell me about it.” Jill pulled at my leg, willing me to slip under the covers again. She pushed herself on top of me and let her face hover over mine. “Can I ask you a favour?”

“Depends. Is it sexual?” I craned my neck upward to kiss her.

“I need a plus-one next Friday. For a friend’s birthday party. I can’t miss it, but Sophie will be there.”

“Planning on playing the old jealousy card?”

She nodded. “I thought you would understand.”

“Why make her jealous if you don’t want her anymore?”

“I just want to make it clear there’s life after Sophie Ashmore, that I’m not spending my days weeping for her.”

“Sure,” I said. “But let’s discuss my fee first.”

“Gladly.” She released the pressure on her arms and let her body crash down on me. “I only pay in kind though.”

To be continued…