My Difficult Life As Louis Tomlinson's Sister

Chapter 11

"And then El and I were at Starbucks and these fuckin paps were everywhere! It made me so aggressive! I nearly beat the shit out of them!" Louis told us from his day as we ate dinner. I laughed the whole time, fake laughed.
"Yeah, paps. Pfff." I said and continued "eating". I played the whole time with my food. Eating was just one of the most horrible things in the world.
Playing with my food was a trick. I never really "ate" I played with my food and acted like I eat.
But to be honest sometimes I have a little bag under the table where I every time they didn't look at me threw my food in. So they would think I ate. I know it's sick, but I just dislike eating so much. The most people can't understand it, but I like being skinny.

"And what did you two do today?" Louis asked Harry and me. I looked at Harry and begged that he didn't tell Louis.
"Ehmm... I was out all day." Harry said and continued eating, how disgusting.
"And I watched movies..." I mumbled and looked proud on my empty plate.
"I ate everything!" I said proudly and Louis smiled. Oh, Louis. Poor naïve, Louis.
"Okay, that's good." Louis said and smiled more and more. Harry rolled his eyes, did he see it? He couldn't. I mean it was the best idea I got this week. I never had an idea like this before. It was so intelligent from me. Harry never looked at me while eating! He couldn't see it!
"What did you eat to lunch, Liz?" Louis asked me and I fake smiled really fast and lied to him.
"I ate one apple and a lot sweets in my room! I never ate so many sweets! I didn't know what I missed all the time! It's so delicious!" I smiled and was super happy all of the sudden. Louis smiled and believed my act, Harry just rolled his eyes again. This boy should really stop to act all overprotecting and caring. I knew he didn't care, I knew he would just hurt me. But at this time I didn't know how much he would hurt me...

"Louis...I... Ehmm...meet someone later. I don't know when I am back." I said and looked nervously on the ground.
"Okay. I wish you a lot fun." Louis said and smiled. Was Louis serious?! Even my cat wouldn't believe me if I would tell them that!
"Thank you!" I said and fake smiled.
"Oh Liz! Here it's for you." Louis smiled and handled me £100! I grinned and thanked him.
I walked out of the room and my smile was away. I think I should become an actor. I mean I am really good in acting! Maybe I would even get a Oscar!

I walked into my room and dressed really slutty. I wore some black panties, black lace tights, black high heels, a fake flue jacket in white and one of my black Chanel bags. I did my make up really slutty and then I silently walked out of the flat.
I drove with the elevator down and walked to the nearest taxi, the taxi men looked at me, horny asshole. But who could blame him? I was looking like a whore. I know it's not normal to say that about yourself, but it's true!
I also say things like I am ugly, fat, disgusting, worthless and a monster about myself.

Why is life always so difficult? I just want a little bit fun. Why are the most people always so overprotective? Why are people like this to me? Why is everyone always acting like they are worried about me? I am a normal 17 years old girl. Okay, I am a little bit fake, but still.
The taxi driver stopped by the club where I was already yesterday. I walked towards the doorman. He smirked at me and let me in. I rolled my eyes and walked inside.
I walked towards the bar and looked around. I needed more drugs.
Where is he? I needed to find him. I needed some weed.
But at first... I walked in the bathroom and everything went past really fast. I took some cocaine. I sat on the disgusting ground in the toilet carbine and took it. That's how my life went... I was a normal child, with a lot of dreams and a lot of fears. And now? I am not afraid of anything and anyone and dreams? What are dreams?

After a little while I felt how it took over me. I was wild, I was happy, I felt perfect. All the thoughts I just had minutes ago were away...

The time in the club went past really fast, I really enjoyed the time there.
It was as always there, it was fun to enjoy the night with also high people. It just made yourself feel not like you were the only person with lost dreams and a lot of problems...