Chapter 34

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"5...6...7...8...roll..clap..jump..tap..tap..tap.." Mr. Schue direct us for this weekend sectionals.

"Dacryoadenitis is inflammation of the tear-producing gland." I mumbled while doing some steps.

"Bianca, focus on that song too!" Mr. Schue says.

"I'm sorry, I'm studying, Mr. Schue." I sigh and stops.

"But this is glee club. Stop studying and focus about regionals!" Mr. Schue protest.

"I'm just trying to get my scholarship is that wrong?" I asks.

"But you already accepted in NYU School of Medical." Finn says to me.

"What? You told Finn but you didnt tell me or even mom or dad?" Blaine gasps.

"Yeah, but I will try to get UCL." I said to Blaine nervously.

"What UCL?" Brittany asks.

"University College London. It's in England." I said to them.

"B, you said that you only want NYU and now you got that." Blaine frowns at me.

"I did but mom and dad wont proud if I tell them, I got that. They want something more. Look, Blaine, I'm the only one daughter and youngest one in our house but look at you and Cooper. You both are bright like a shining star and me? I'm just a mess girl. They always listen to you and Cooper but what about me? They doesnt even let me make my own decision." My eyes glacing and turn my head down.

"But B..." Blaine got cut off.

"You dont see how happy they were when you got called for your first NYADA auditions? Even they took first class plane only to see your auditions? And me? I have to study hard. I have to wrote my own proposal and send it to some universities by myself. You are senior class president and you can get into NYADA easily. I'm sorry, Mr. Schue but I guess I cant be on regionals. You still have enough member to join because I'm trying to fix my life." I'm crying and about to walk off.

"If you walk out from that door, you're not my sister anymore!" Blaine yells at me.

I stop my way with tears still fall down on my face. I'm just standing frozen here. Didnt turn my body back or say anything.

"B, grow up. You're not little girl anymore. You're senior and in several months you will be in college. Stop being so selfish." Blaine says.

"That's why I'm trying to make decision, Blaine. I'm going to London and I'll make my future there." I'm sobbing.

"London is not what you want! You're just trying to follow what dad said that night. You're not making a decision but you're just trying to have deal with it." Blaine move my body and make me facing him but I'm still crying my head down.

"I'm just trying to make them proud. Some people might think that I'm lucky enough to be in Anderson. Like I have handsome and famous big brother, I have a dad who owns a big hospital, I have a mom who is a lecturer in a state university and I have a twin brother who will be broadway star. What about me? I'm just a girl who try to find herself." I'm sobbing.

"You know what? You are wonderful, you're amazing, you're awesome, you're smart, you're beautiful, and you have a beautiful heart. That's what make you different. B, you dont know how much I wish I could be like you? You care about someone more than to yourself, you're kind. I really wish that I could be like you but I cant because I'm Blaine, I'm not Bianca. You're just tired because people keep pushing you to be a person that you dont want to be." Blaine hold my sleeve.

I didnt say anything and still sobbing about what he just said. Blaine knows myself better than I am.

"Tell dad that you dont want to be a doctor but you want to be an artist because you love arts." Blaine says to me.

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