Typical Blogger//Joe Sugg

Chapter 33

Olivia's Pov

-1 week later-

I was home. It felt good to be home. I hated the hospital but I suppose everyone did. It felt good to be alone. No matter how much I loved all my friends there was nothing more than I wanted to be alone, to think about everything. Zoe had offered to stay with me for a while to make sure I was ok however I insisted I would be fine. Joe had texted me a lot but I've ignored the texts. I need time and he has to accept that because he hurt me. All I wanted was my mum she knew how to make everything ok. I hadn't told her about anything because I knew she would be disappointed in me and that's something I couldn't bear.

Currently I was lying in bed thinking about anything and everything. There was so much to think about and I had so much to say and there was only two ways I knew how to express my feelings.

I walked over to my wardrobe and picked out a pair of shorts and a sports bra along with a cropped hoodie. I got changed into the clothes and put on a pair of trainers. I tied my hair up into a ponytail and grabbed my phone and a pair of headphones before leaving the house. I plugged my headphones into my phone and shuffled a random playlist and started running to the dance studio.

As usual the same grumpy lady was behind the desk. She annoyed me, she was so grumpy, she has one job to make people feel welcome but with a face like hers she couldn't welcome anyone. I had been many times before so I knew what to do which meant I didn't have to converse with the lady. I signed my name in the book for what room I wanted and made my way up there.

I took off my trainers and placed them on the side. I took my headphones out of my phone and scrolled through the list of songs that I have downloaded on my phone until I found the perfect one. I turned up the volume and played the song making my way to the middle of the floor before dancing letting all my emotions go.

The song nobody's perfect is relatable at this moment there's nothing that relates to me more

I hate that I let you down

And I feel so bad about it

I guess karma comes back around

Cause now I'm the one's that's hurting

And I hate that I made you think

That the trust we have is broken

Don't tell me you can't forgive me

Cause nobody's perfect

I hate that I let Joe down but it's true that karma comes back around because I'm the one that's hurting

Joe's Pov

I felt terrible I snapped at Liv for nothing just because I wasn't ready. I didn't think abut what she was feeling. In that moment it was just me. I only cared about me. I was on my way to talk to her. She has ignored all my texts that I've sent her but who could blame her I mean what I did to her was terrible.

I told Caspar I was going out before leaving the apartment and locking the door. Just as I turned round to go to Liv's apartment I noticed a girl walking down the corridor. I could tell it was Liv instantly as she had her long blonde hair and her rocking body.

"Liv!"

I shouted. No reaction. Either she could't hear me or she was ignoring me. I followed her out of the complex and watched as she started running down the road. I followed behind her in a fast walk as she turned down several roads. Her pace started to pick up and soon i lost sight of her however I knew where she was going because I knew she loved to dance and she had taken me to the dance studio many times before so I remembered the way she took me and this was it.

When I finally reached the studio, I walked in and looked at the book that Liv always signs her name in. I saw her perfectly neat handwriting and saw the number of the room before making my way up there. As I reached the room I noticed the door was slightly a jar. I pushed it open a bit more and stood in the door way watching her.

She was an excellent dancer and showed so much emotion. She was hurt and it was all my fault. I hate that I made her think that she wasn't perfect or that I didn't love her because I do and she is perfect. None of it was her fault yet I turned it back round on her to make it look like I was the innocent one when really it was all my fault. I hate knowing that she nearly died because of me, if I didn't make her think that she was useless and unloved she would still be mine and everything would be fine.

She finished the dance breathing heavily looking with no emotion. I clapped. Her head shot up and she looked at me. That's when I saw the emotion. Anger and hurt.

"Joe what are you doing here"

"Um I followed you"

"Great I can't go anywhere now without the thought of you following me"

"Listen Liv I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that I made you think you weren't perfect or that you were unloved. But the truth is Liv, I don't deserve you, your perfect and every guy swoons over you. I'm sorry that I snapped you because you really didn't deserve that. It was all my fault and I put it on you making me look innocent. The thing is Liv I love you and I hope you can forgive me and we can start a family. Together"

"Joe you don't get it. I want to forgive more than anything but every time I see you, I'm reminded of hurt. You say you love me but love is sticking with someone no matter what and when I told you Joe, you hated me it was almost like you wanted me dead. I still remember standing there, with you towering over me saying to get out. You raised you hand and I thought you were going to hit me. I've never been so scared in my life, so scared of you. It made me think I can't be with someone if they scare me. I can't live everyday scared if your going to snap at me. No matter how much I love you, it hurts seeing you"

The words hurt. she was scared, scared of me

"Liv I can't tell you enough how sorry I am. I regret everything. If I could take back one thing in my life it would be the way I treated you. I love you Liv and I love everything about you. I wish you could find a way in you heart to forgive me"

"Joe I love you but I need time"

"Ok time I can deal with that just don't give up on me yet Liv please"

"Goodbye Joe"

She walked out the room leaving me alone. I wasn't letting her go I was just giving her space and time like she needed. One thing I'v learnt is that sometimes love just isn't enough

Word Count:1245

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