Salvation {Negan FanFic}

F O R T Y F I V E

Instead of bursting out crying and screaming, I started puking.  I then started crying and screaming. I could not believe my eyes. I refused to believe this was happening. I wasn't mad at anyone but myself. Not even Negan. I was the one to do this. I am the one who told Mike what I as doing and let him help me, and then didn't even follow through with the plan, I killed Mike.

"You bastard! You fucking evil person!" I cried, standing up and running over to him grabbing his arm.

"Hey now, none of that." Negan said, grabbing both of my upper arms to try and restrain me as I struggled to try and hit him. "See...this is your punishment-"

"Just kill me already! You didn't have to do that, this was all me!" I cried. I opened my mouth to yell more, but I couldn't. Instead, I gave up, feeling as if all the air in my lungs had been taken out. I stopped struggling, and looked down, and continued to cry harder then I have in a long time.

"I know, I know." He said, running a hand through my hair, I tried to pull away from his touch. "But, lets not make a scene in front of my men." He said quietly in my ear. He motioned for someone to come over, telling them "Take her to the truck and make sure he stays."

With that, he passed me off to another man who walked me over to Negan's truck. He pushed me into the passenger seat, slamming the door. It caused me to jump a little, at this point my nerves were shot. I sat here emotionless, looking down at my feet in the dark as I waitd for something to happen. I looked up and saw Negan talking to that Caleb guy and the other people over there for a minute. He then made his way back over to the truck, telling the man watching me to leave.

He threw Lucille in the bed of the truck, hopping in, and starting it up. He drove slower, and more steadily then usual which I found off, and his expression was dark, and emotionless. He was completely silent on the way back to base, not taking his eyes off the road once.

We got back, pulling into the pavilion. It looked like Negan hadn't taken any men with him from here because we were the only ones who were pulling in. He got of the truck with a loud slam of the door, grabbing Lucille. I followed closely behind him as he walked quickly to get inside.

As soon as we go inside, he grabbed my arm tightly, pulling me into the only empty room which happened to be the medical room...god, thanks a lot.

He let go of me, slamming the door. He turned back, not looking at me. He ran both of his hands through his hair a few times as he began to pace. I didn't say anything...he seemed tense. I was still crying.

"Okay...so, now we've got all that done- What the fuck is wrong with you?" He snapped, causing me to jump. I didn't say anything, just sniffling, wiping some of my tears. "Huh? Are you gong to explain anything to me? Because I am pretty fucking close to letting you go live with your friends over there and see how they are treated...because you fucked up- oh, you've fucked up big time missy, so explain. Now." He said in a stern tone.

I collected my thought, wiping more tears off my face, only to be replaced with new ones. I looked at Negan, about to say everything that happened. Instead, I just looked at him for a moment, finding myself at a loss for words.

Do you ever just have a terrible day, and you see that one person that somehow makes it all better and you just want them to hug you and tell you it will be all better? I looked at Negan and wanted him to brush his hand through my hair and kiss my head and whisper words into my ear like he would. He just killed someone I cared about. But for some reason, I wanted to cry and cry to him and just wanted him to comfort me.

"I'm sorry...I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." I blubbered like a baby. "I wanted to get out. I wanted to leave. This was all me...you looked at me and I couldn't kill you..." I said. "I just wanted to go home." I started to cry into my hands.

He didn't do or say anything for a while, but I felt his eyes on me. I continued to cry, not caring what he was probably thinking about me.

"Stop fucking crying all the time!" He yelled, walking over to me.

He wrapped both arms tightly around me, squishing me to him. "I'm going to be all you need...I am your fucking home. Got it?" He said quietly to me.

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Ok ok so last chapter got a rise out of a lot of you. Most comments on a chapter ina while. I'm sorry. This is for you, person who asked me to update soon 👊🏻 please vote, comment, and follow. Thankies! 🤘🏻💫👊🏻 add me on snapchat too at Casswee23 because I seriously am in love with my readers 😩