You have never felt these feelings before,
Not until you became part of a new family,
In a place called Slender Mansion,
It's an interesting place,
Where people and 'things' live,
And the best part?
We're all bloody psychopaths.
Who LOVE to murder.
...
It's only human to be jealous right? No one ever said I couldn't be. I just.. Can't get it around my head. Yet I brought this on myself and I know that, if only I wasn't so slow. Then that fucking clock of a boy wouldn't be the one she called her boyfriend. Hoodie is pretty upset too, I'm sure. Eyeless Jack doesn't seem to care and Laughing Jack didn't give a fuck in the first place. Jeff and Jane are to busy fighting, clearly that have the hots for each other. It's practically torture to walk past Jeff's room sometimes. I still cringe at the noises, yuck just nooooooo.
I shook my head. Toby and I haven't been talking for days. Hoodie and Rumour went on a mission three days ago and I've been as lonely and depressed as fuck. I spend hours locked in my room and at dinner I barely eat, instead using the time to glare at that twitchy bastard. He even stopped annoying me. Though I've heard something he might gain interest in. That slutty little clock eyed bitch is coming back from London. Clockwork just up and left, Toby was heartbroken, she made no effort to keep contact and hurt him pretty bad. Now he finally has a girlfriend the slut is coming back. Probably wants him single forever. I can't believe he falls for her slutty attempts.
(Time skip to a few days later, brought to you by Rumour smashing offenderman's head into a plate of papyrus' frozen spaghetti!)
Yeah she came alright.
To my absolute disapproval she was all over me. Constantly trying to get into my pants. Nope. Nope. Nope. Still a slutty bitch. Rumour and Hoodie went on a really long mission, I wonder how she will react to Clockwork being here.
I sighed for the tenth time, clockwork had spotted me and Toby sitting on the couch with a strong tension between us. He would eye her and she would try to sit on my lap, touch my 'area' and my chest and try to make me touch her. I had enough of being polite and my patience ran thin, "FUCK. OFF. NATILE!" I practically yelled. Clockwork huffed and dragged Toby off to his room again, filthy scum. Cheating on Rumour with a slut like that! Doesn't he love her? I crossed my arms angrily. I want to rip him apart limb by limb.
I sighed leaning my head back. Hearing a softer sigh similar to mine I looked up to see Hoods. So. Where's Rumour then? Probably in her room resting... right?
- Your p.o.v -
Over the time Hoods and I were on our mission I kept thinking about Toby. He was always so sweet and funny. The more I thought about him the closer I felt to him. Even if he was far away. By the time we were heading back I was genuinely in love. I can picture him in my head, tall slender figure, pale greyish skin, oaky brown hair that brushed his bright orange goggles and black mouth guard. I can remember how happy he was when I said yes and how his eyes literally sparkle with joy sometimes. I think I love him, I really do.
When I got home I snuck past the lounge room to Toby's room. I decided I would surprise him of my arrival. So I hid. I hid on his top bunk. I curled up into a ball into a corner laughing at my childishness as I covered myself with the dooner that was screwed up at the end of the bed.
It was no longer then ten minutes before someone entered the room, I was about to surprise the crap out of them when I heard two voices. Toby was definitely one and some girl. They talked quietly and it was inaudible to me.
"See? There's no one here," the girls voice says and I feel the dooner get tugged a little. I hear a sigh.
Tears clouded my vision, why? WHY?! Always, I'm sick of it, THIS ALWAYS HAPPENS! I'm always betrayed, I'm always treated like shit. I'm sick of it! Now I'm stuck here listening to this because I won't dare give away my hiding place. I'm practically drowning in my tears as I attempt to be quiet when all I want to do is jump out of the rocking bed and scream at the top of my lungs to drown the moans. Her clothes are strewn on the ground with his in a tumbled mess. All I can do is wait. I hear people call my name in my head. My mother, my father. All the alarms are going off yet I can do nothing.
But they stay there. I have to be agonising quiet while I wait for them to fall asleep. Then I climb down. That girl. She's the one from the photo. I wipe my tears on my sleeve before putting my mask back on. I go to his desk, I see the picture, I couldn't stop my self, I grabbed the photo and ripped it until it was barely shreds. Then I leave, shutting the door behind me.
I make my way to my room, I shut the door behind me and rip my hoodie off. I pull my turtle neck down and I reach for my knife. I pull up my sleeves and cut into my neck.
The darkness pours in through my window the only light, that consisting off the moon and stars. I wanted to die. I had enough of life. I've given up. The blade pushes deeper into my neck and reaches my air tube but before it can go any deeper and hand clasps itself over mine dragging the knife away from my neck. That same hand is pushed to my neck to stop the bleeding. That same person pulls me into a hug and I got stiff. I'm terrified it's Toby. I hear a soft sigh in my ear. I can't believe I forgot to lock my door. I can literally hear my heart breaking as the memory forces itself to replay in my head. It's been what? A fucking day? A fucking week was enough for that twitchy man whore.
I cry, that's all I can do. I don't know who's hugging me but I can't do anything. I feel so helpless. Why did they even help me, I can't die from this, the scars on my neck are proof. Suicide, it's stuck in my head. Why do I even live? But whoever it is that has me in their arms, they care, they want me to live. If it's Toby I swear I will make him feel pain, somehow. As the moonlight pours into the window I see an orange jacket, Masky or Hoodie, unless Toby or someone decided to try a new style. "Shh, shh, it's okay," Hoodie's soothing voice pierces the air. But the memory stays, I cry even harder turning my body to hug him. Our hearts beat together as I pour my pain out. I remove my mask and dig my face into his chest, it's more comfortable and easy to cry.
He stayed with me the whole night and I told him my story, I told him everything and prayed he wouldn't hate me like my dreams told me. I told him every cut and every attempt, and everything I did, but I didn't tell him my eye colour or show him my face and I didn't tell him my real name. He didn't leave me, he didn't call me things, he wasn't disgusted in me, he didn't hate me. He stayed and listened, then I showed him the cuts, the scars and my neck. But first I put my mask on. I never realised how much more comfortable I was around Hoodie then Toby. Toby, he had nothing on me but he still hurt me, he didn't know it yet, but he did, and somewhere in my subconsciousness I wanted to hurt him, it was probably equally as cruel on everyone when I lifted Hoodie's mask until his lips we're visible, did the same to mine and pressed my lips against his. Giving away my first kiss and though I didn't know it, stealing his own. The moment our virgin lips met I felt fireworks explode in my heart, it was something I had never felt before yet it felt so right. I, I think this is love. Craving to be around someone, I know I did, I always took note of him, I think I wanted this from the start, but my heart wouldn't accept love. But as I finally pulled away I was ok, I was ok. Even if he didn't like me in return, that was ok. I.. I just need some sleep.
Woah 1481 words.
Intense!
Peace out ~ Untitled_hearts
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