"I thought you were watching the movie?" I ask him very hesitantly.
"Yeah, I was, but you were gone for awhile. I just wanted to know what's up? Who called?" He asks.
"Nobody, just a friend." I answer.
"Well, are you guys done talking? We're kind of in the middle of a movie." He says as he sits down right next to me.
I jolt right on to my feet. He looks up at me, thrown off by my action.
"What was that?" He says as he gets on his feet as well.
"Nothing, I have an emergency. I have to go, I'm sorry." I panic.
"What happened?" He asks.
"Nothing, I just have to go." I say as I start taking a few steps back.
"Is it a family emergency? I'll drive you home." He offers.
"No, it's fine. Watch your movie. I really have to go."
"I don't care about the movie, I care about, I care about what's going on with you."
"There's nothing going on, I just have to go." I say as I pull my phone back up to my ear, still not breaking eye contact with Shawn.
He suddenly gives me a dirty look, as if he knew something. Wait of course he knows something, he's the one that beat Jack.
"You're talking to Johnson? Why?" He growls. How does he know I'm talking to Johnson?
"How do you kn-"
"When you raised your phone to your ear, the screen flashed and I saw his name."
"Oh." I reply. Not knowing what to say.
"Hang up the call." Shawn says.
"No, I'm leaving." I say as I turn and start walking through the lobby.
"Amy, hang up." He says while following me out the theater. I push the door open in front of me and speed walk my way through the plaza.
"Amy, hang up. Trust me you don't want anything to do with him. You don't even want to be talking to Johns-" I stop walking and turn around to face Shawn.
"Why? Why would I not want anything to do with him? What do you have against him, Shawn? He's done nothing to you, and he's done no harm to me. He's my friend and we need each other." I bark. He has this shocked facial expression. As if I said something that I shouldn't have said.
"You really think this guy is some kind of angel? I've been friends with this guy longer than you have, don't bitch at me for somebody you don't even know that well."
"Now I'm bitching? You seriously have no clue on what I'm talking about. I can't believe y-..actually I'm leaving. I'm not about to waste all of my breath on a guy who can't even be a man about this. You can't even own up to your mistakes." I snarl.
"What are you even talking about?! What fucking mistakes!? I didn't do sh-"
"Shut up, Shawn. Just shut up." I tell him.
"Okay, Amy. That's exactly what I'm going to do even though you're over here blaming me for something I didn't do." He's definitely starting to raise his voice with me now.
"For something you didn't do? So you obviously didn't beat Jack? You obviously didn't fuck up his rib cage? You obviously had nothing to do with that? He's just sitting there in a hospital bed blaming you for something you didn't do?" I popped off. Completely.
He's frozen. His face has lost all of its color and he's no longer yelling, or raising his voice. I'm not even sure how he's reacting to my response. He looks down at me, his eyes are dark one moment and seem so innocent the next. I don't want to believe Johnson, but why would Johnson lie to me? Exactly, he wouldn't.
Shawn still hasn't said a word to me, he's now looking down, but not looking down to my level, but looking down on to the ground. Say something, please say something. Say it was all a lie, say Jack was the one that actually came on to you and you had to defend yourself, just say something.
"Shawn, please say something. Talk to me. You can't just let me go off on you like that without a reaction. Tell me it's a lie. Tell me I'm lying. Tell me he's lying." I can feel this knot starting to form in my throat. It's getting hard to breathe, I can feel and hear my heart pumping. It's as if someone was trying to break out of a boxed room, banging on the walls, attempting to escape, but can't get out, so all you can hear is the banging on the walls from a distance. It's like someone was trying get out, out of my heart, but they're trapped. And they will be for awhile.
I try to meet his gaze, but he's still.
"Well I guess that proves it. Goodbye Shawn, thanks for not being honest with me. I really do appreciate it." I say as I wipe my eyes, trying to avoid my tears being visible enough for him to see. I turn around and continue walking.
I look down at my phone, realizing that I completely forgot that I was still on the phone with Johnson. I raise the device up to my ear and begin to speak to him.
"So I'm guessing you heard all of that?" I say as I keep wiping my eyes.
"Yeah, but he deserved it. Shawn's a douche now." Johnson says through the phone.
"I just wouldn't expect him to do that, he was so good to me. He was there for me, he took care of me when he barely knew me. I don't know, I just wasn't expecting us to grow so close."
"He's manipulative, that's his specialty. Now stop being all sappy and shit, and be happy because I'm about to solve all of your problems and pick you up. We can get burgers after." He says while slight chuckling.
I laugh at his comment.
"Alright then, hurry up because I'm really trying to eat some burgers now."
"Cool it, I'm already putting my sweater on and getting ready to leave."
"Alright, I'll be waiting for you by the Starbucks."
"Alright, bye."
"Bye."
I hang up and search the plaza for the Starbucks. I finally spot it and walk towards it. I was about to stay out and wait outside sitting at one of the tables, but I feel like I need rinse my face out with some water. Something to wake me up from all of this.
I walk in and am overwhelmed by all the noise coming from the blenders, and the distant chatter. I am aroused by the sweet smell of coffee, I don't drink coffee very often, but its scent gets to me every time.
I walk in to the restroom and notice that nobody else is inside. I walk up to the sink, turn on the faucet, and get 2 handfuls of water and throw the water on to my face. As the cool water hits my skin, I remember the look Shawn had on his face. I can't seem to stop thinking about it, the way his eyebrows were slightly raise, the way the tip of his hair casted a slight shadow over his forehead, the way his eyes were unreadable, the way his skin automatically lost color. All of it, I can't stop replaying that image.
I dry my face with a paper towel and look in to the mirror. I look normal, I guess. Even though I feel like every emotion is taking over me on the inside.
I take a deep breath and then walk out of the restroom. As I walk out, I check my phone and see that I got a text from Johnson.
Johnson: omw
Me: ok
I put my phone in my pocket and scan the room for an empty seat. None. I guess I'll sit outside, and wait.
I walk out and sit in one of the many empty seats, and just scan the area.
I see middle aged couples walking around, having some kind of "date night". They're holding hands and laughing with one another as if they were young again. I also see a group of about 5 thirteen year olds being loud, and are probably pumped about going to the movies with their friends. I look inside the Starbucks and see several groups of what it looks like to be college students paired up with a partner, working on something in their computers. God, college seems so overwhelming. These students make it seem like it's not a big deal. They make it seem easy, and fun, like the movies. I look at these students and wonder if they're under an overwhelming amount of stress, or if they're suffering from social anxiety because of their grades, or their majors, or about college in general.
My phone suddenly starts vibrating, I pull it out and realize it's Johnson calling. He's probably here.
"Hey, are you here?" I say in to the phone.
"Yeah, I just entered the plaza. I'm driving a wack ass Honda."
"Hondas are nice, what are you talking about?" I laugh, as I get up and start walking towards the parking lot.
"It has a couple of scratches." He says as a gray Honda pulls up with several bumps or whatever. God, it looks they had some trouble with their parallel parking since the rear of the car, and the front of it are all beat up.
"So are you gonna want some burgers or what?" He yells out with a smile. I nod and start walking towards the vehicle. As I walk up, something catches Johnson's eye and makes him get out of the car rapidly.
"Hey, what are you looking at?" I ask him as I turn around.
"You're really leaving with this fuck?" A familiar voice yells.
"What I do with myself obviously doesn't concern you, just like what you do with yourself doesn't concern me." I spit. Johnson starts walking a few steps towards him. I grab him by his sweater.
"This isn't for you, Shawn isn't here because of you, but because of me, just please, sit in the car. I'll handle this." I say trying to calm Johnson down. He turns around and leans against the car. I turn back around and face Shawn.
"Why can't you just go?" I ask him.
"Why can't you realize what's good for and what isn't. Jack wasn't any good for you, and you're blaming for what I did?" He yells.
"What am I supposed to think Shawn? That you're some kind of hero? A hero that goes around sending innocent people to the hospital."
"Innocent people? Jack isn't innocent, Amelia. Why can't you get that through your fucking mind? He fucked you over, Amelia. That makes him innocent?"
"Stop talking about it!" My voice starts to crack as I scream at him. My cheeks are on fire, I can feel every emotion start to bubble up inside of me. Here it goes with that feeling. That aching feeling going through my body, that knot that's starting to form in the back of my throat.
I look at Shawn, I really look at him. I see this angry, skinny, tall boy teenage boy screaming at me about my problems. He's nothing but toxic to me now. I have to get away from him, but my body feels paralyzed as I'm standing here yelling at him just 10 feet away for me.
"Okay, you know what? I'm going to let you ruin your fucking year. You're going around yelling at me, blaming me for something I should've done from the start. Just go, go and visit your janky ex boyfriend. The ex boyfriend that cheated on you-"
"Stop it. Don't you dare bring him up. I was wrong for telling you in the first place." I snarl as I take a few steps towards him.
"Hey, I'm just telling the truth here. He cheated on you because you didn't give him something as little as virginity." He screams.
My heart beat is going through the roof right now and I don't know what I'll do next. My eyes start to swell up at the thought of Jack cheating on me, at the thought of our last conversation ever, that night.
"Stop it, Shawn. Stop it. Stop it." As of this moment, I'm trying to keep up with all of my voice cracks and the tears rolling down my cheeks.
"You guys were together for how long? A year? Maybe two? And you still wouldn't give it to him. He met a beautiful girl in Texas and fucked her that same day. Now I'm starting to see why he did it."
Boom. I did it. I did it again. My right hand feels numb and Shawn seems angry yet unbothered by the action. He doesn't even cup his cheek, I look upon him. I look up at him and see the sweat beading down his face from all the anger inside of him and all the screaming. I can tell it really drained his energy. He looks down on me with, well with, he looks down on me with his eyes. With those dark pupils, I can no longer see the hazel in his eyes anymore. I can't find it. I can't find him, not in those eyes, not in those dark pupils. I don't know who's in there, but it's not Shawn.
He's not reacting. I hate it when he does this to me.
"And that's the thing with you. You're stubborn and close minded as fuck. You just slapped me for putting you in your place, for putting Jack in his place. You know why I did it in the first place? You know why I beat the living shit out of him? Because of you. Do you have any idea on what happened that night when you called me? Remember? You were a wreck. A fucking wreck because of that dick head, so I found him. You know what I found him doing? I found him beating the shit out of Cam, if it weren't for me Cam would be in the fucking hospital. Cam didn't do shit, if anything he stopped me from killing that fucker. He's a piece of shit. Now you're letting that fucker's best friend pick you up? What's he going to do? What are you guys going to do? Are you gonna fuck him since you wouldn't do his bestfr-"
Johnson comes from behind me and is about to swing at Shawn. I immediately grab his arm and pull him back.
"This isn't worth the fight. Don't do it, he's just messing with your head. He wants you to get angry, just don't give in." I say to Johnson as my voice shakes.
Shawn takes about 2 steps closer to Johnson and looks down on him and scoffs.
"What's stopping you, buddy?" Shawn says with a smirk.
I look around us and people around are just watching us intently. Oh gosh, I think they heard our argument and saw me slap him. We need to go, before anyone thinks we're a threat or something.
I pull Johnson's arm and start taking a few steps back before he does anything else. I can tell they're both holding back by the way they're looking at one another.
"Let's go, Johnson. Let's just go, please." I say as I tug on to his arm.
Johnson finally turns around and starts walking with me to the car. I get in to my seat and he gets in to his.
Shawn looks at us from a distance, but his face is expressionless.
He looks at from outside, but I turn away as Johnson slowly starts driving out of the plaza parking lot.
