The End Where I Begin (Book Four of the Glen Power Series)

Chapter 39

No one knows how difficult this is.

I mean, come on. I've just given birth to the most beautiful babies in the world. Shared the most perfect moment with my husband. And my boyfriend is outside waiting.

How do you deal with that?

I look at Glen and see the sadness in his eyes. Everything that's happened over the past nine months has just come swarming back. Long gone is the happiness, the perfection. It's been tainted by the cold reality of what I've done to him. I can't stand to see this.

“Glen...”

“It's okay. He's waiting.”

He hands Lucy back over to me and I can't stop the tears as he gets out of the bed.

“Glen, don't...”

“He needs to see his girlfriend's babies. Without me in the way.” He's heading to the door.  

“Don't leave me!”

My cry makes him hesitate. His shoulders slump as he turns back around with a sigh.

“I don't want to,” he whimpers. “But you chose him. And I need to respect that.”

“Glen, please...”

“I won't run off again. I'll be here for our children. But you need him. More than you've ever needed me. So when he's gone, I'll come back. I just...don't want to get in the way of true love.”

And as he walks out, his last words ring in my ears. True love...

I must be alone for a while, because when Danny bounces in, it's like he didn't even see Glen. I plaster a smile on my face as he coos over the twins. But all I can really think of is that I've lost him. I've lost the love of my life.

Rina's the next to come in. I can hardly stand to look at her. I've destroyed her life. Taken the one thing that she loves more than anything and done so much damage to it that I don't think it can ever be fixed.

But I do. I smile gratefully at her as she gushes over the little ones. Acting like nothing ever happened between us. Danny's lips press against my forehead, and then my lips, and I try to act like this is the best moment in the world. When in fact, that moment has been torn to bits. All because of...

Where is he anyway? I thought he would be the first in here. Wanting to make sure that I'm here and alive and all of that. Why isn't he here?

And then he is. Hovering in the doorway, too afraid to come in. Even through it all, I can't help but smile at him. A genuine smile. I do love him. And I want him to be here on the biggest day of my life. I just wish...

I don't know when the others leave. I don't even notice that they aren't here until Mark is snuggled up next to me. His arm is around me, his cheek resting against me as he looks down at my babies. I glance down and watch them. How will the act with him now that they're in the real world?

No different. They act no different to how they were with Glen. Trying to take in the world around them silently. Their big blue eyes focusing on mine, occasionally darting to him. But it's nothing like the stillness...

“They're beautiful, Em.”

“I know.”

“They look like you.”

“No they don't. They have their daddy's eyes.”

“But they have their mummy's beauty. Her radiance. Her perfection.”

I know where this is going. I don't want to look at him. I don't want to see the heartbreak on his face. I blink back the tears, nuzzling my nose against that of my children.