To Keep Her Safe (Liam Payne) UNDER MAJOR RECONSTRUCTION

Chapter Nine*

THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS POTENTIALLY TRIGGERING MATERIAL. PLEASE USE CAUTION WHILE READING.

                               *****READERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED******

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Songs of the chapter: Strawberry Gashes by: Jack Off Jill, Kiss it Better by: He is We

Chapter Nine

Louise's Point of View

I push a strand of Elly's hair back from her face as she rests in my lap. We are in the waiting room now because we got kicked out of Harry's room when El became hysterical. The poor thing cried herself to sleep as soon as we were escorted out here. The automatic door opens and I look up to see Niall walking towards us. His eyes widen when he sees me,and El with her tear-stained cheeks.

"How?" Is all he says as he approaches us.

"He's been poisoning himself. Slipping drugs for the past two weeks. They had to pump his stomach four times since we've been here."

"How did we let it get this out of hand, Lou?" He says,taking the seat beside me.

"I don't think anyone really saw it coming..."

"No, not that. With his parents, with Candy, with his...........everything. We had the power to change all of that and I--"

"Save it Niall," Elly says obviously just waking up ",We know we could've saved him. But this isn't entirely our fault. Okay yeah, we probably should've been more helpful but there's nothing we can do anymore. We just have to be there for him if--when--he comes to." I notice that she's shaking, whether from guilt or sadness I don't know. A doctor comes over to us, asks us if we're with Harry. We say yes and he escorts us to Harry's new room. We walk past a sign on our way over. 'Intensive Care' it reads, I gulp at the sight. Nothing could prepare me for what I saw.

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Elly's Point of View

I cry as soon as we walk in.

Tubes are in and out of Harry's arms. He's covered in gauze. He's got a mask around his nose to breathe. My baby, my sweet, innocent child on life support. Why couldn't I have been all he needed? Why didn't he tell me? I drop Louise's hand and walk over to him. He's much paler than usual. I push a curl away from his face, running a finger down his face. I clutch his hand and fall to my knees. His hands are so cold. A wail rakes through my chest and I feel like I have nothing left to cry. All I can make are noises, strangley pimitive ones at that.

"H-harry, I'm s-so s-sorry." I say

"It's not you fault love, how could you know?"

I gasp and look up, he looks down at me with glazed eyes. "H-harry, p-please. What' going on in your mind right now.?" I ask him. He shakes his head and a tear rolls down his cheek.

"It didn't work. I'm still here. " He cries. I shake my head and begin to feel tears that I thought I'd used up.

"Harry! H-how could you s-say that? Don't you know th-that there are s-so many people who love you?--"

He drops my hand, takes the face mask off fully. "It doesn't matter! I'm still here, she's still here, they're still here. They will all haunt me. Do you know what It's like to be unsafe inyour own mind? To see all of the terirble things you've done, and know that nothing you do can erase that? When they hurt me, I deserved it. When she hurt me, I deserved it. When I hurt me, El, when I hurt myself, I deserved it. But of all the things I desrve right now, living is not one of them. Not when I have thoughts to keep me bleeding."