thirty eight

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"I don't like the memories because the tears come easily, and once again, I break my promise to myself for this day. It's a constant battle. A war between remembering and forgetting."

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Three days later

Maggie and Sasha are at the Hilltop, and I want to make sure they're okay. Everyone is still recovering from that night. Daryl is gone, and I don't know if I'll ever see him again. He was taken, and it's too dangerous to find him; we're completely outnumbered. I got out of bed and got into the shower, the hot water furiously pounding at my back.

I wiped my face as my thoughts and memories taunted me.

"Skylar?" I heard a knock on the door; it was Carl.

I didn't answer; he already knew it was me.

"Are you okay?" He asked, lowly.

I shook my head, no. He pulled the curtain back, and I didn't care.

He held me, still wearing clothes, getting soaked himself. We both slumped down, and I cried. I sobbed. I wailed. He just kept kissing my head, and I cried. For Daryl, for Abraham, for Glenn.

This is our life now. We are providing for the man who destroyed us.

***

We've been trying to ration anything, anything at all. Supplies are already low, and I don't know how we're supposed to provide for a whole other group.

Negan said he'd be back to take half of our stuff. I was on watch by the gate with Spencer. From the other side, I could hear cars driving up and in one of the cars sat the silhouette of the maniac we call Negan. It hasn't even been a week yet. He whistled as he walked up to the gate, his bat meeting the metal three slow times.

"Little pig, little pig, let me in!"

Spencer hurried to the gate and pulled it open. I saw the face that I never wanted to see again. Rosita slightly pulled me back, not wanting me to get in the way. I bit my lip and was trying to act calm when I wasn't. The metal bars stood between Negan and Spencer.

"Uh...who are you?" Spencer asked cluelessly.

This isn't going to go well. I wanted to run up and smack Spencer upside the head.

"Oh, you better be joking. Negan, Lucille, I know I had to have made a pretty strong first impression," Negan smirked.

Spencer still seemed confused, but Rick walked up behind me, nodded to me and looked into the crowd of Saviours behind Negan.

"Well, hello there," Negan greeted Rick.

Rick just stood there and angrily stared at Negan.

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