A funny word called Love

Chapter 28

"Yura, it's okay, it's okay Yura. Try to take deep breaths, go get a glass of water. I know that telling me all of this must've been hard for you, thank you for telling me. Now take a few deep breaths and get a glass of water, it will help," Otabek said calmly and gently, meanwhile secretly shocked at how much hardship Yuri had gone through.

Yuri did as instructed, and it did help a little bit, and he was no longer sobbing. He felt a bit embarrassed to have broken down like that in front of Otabek but Otabek's face was not filled with judgement or anything along those lines, but rather with worry and concern, as well as shock.

"I'm so sorry that this has all happened to you Yura. I know that me saying sorry isn't particularly helpful, but I honestly don't know what else to say. I wish that I could somehow turn back time and fix your past, but I can't. It's a good thing that you're allowing yourself to show emotions again, and it's a good thing that you're not as afraid of the word love anymore. I'm so so sorry that you ever felt as though you had to hide your emotions and that you were ever afraid of the word love. I'm sorry for everything that happened in your childhood. It's not right and I wish that there was something I could do to make it so that it had never happened."

"Wait, Beka," Yuri interjected, "Why are you crying?"

"I'm crying because I'm upset that you were hurt in this way. I'm crying because I can't even begin to imagine what you've had to go through. I'm crying because I just want to give you a hug but I'm too far away. I'm crying because I always knew that you had the eyes of a soldier and I never knew why, and now I do. It's because you hardened yourself to the world at such a young age and I am so sorry that htis happened to you Yura. I'm so so sorry."

"It's okay, go get a glass of water yourself, you're right, it does help to stop crying."

"I wish there was something I could do to help..." Otabek sighed after taking Yuri's advice and geting a glass of water.

"You already did do something."

"What?"

"This was the first time I told anybody about what happened to my parents. Before, if anybody so much as began to ask me why Grandfather was there instead of my mom and dad, I would just glare at them until they knew that it would be wise to never ask again. I've been bottling it up for so long... I think it was good for me to tell somebody. Thank you for asking, and thank you for listening, it helped more than I ever would have realized. I hadn't actually thought about it in so long. It was a subject that I wouldn't let my brain touch. The memories are just too painful. But I think that it was good for me to think about it again, and it was a lot easier and a lot less painful to be able to think about it with you listening. Thank you Beka."

"I'm glad that it helped. Please, it's good to open up, even if it's hard. Let me know if there's anything I can do to help."

"Of course."

"So, how long are you going to stay in Moscow," Otabek said, changing the subject after deciding that it was probably best to let Yuri process the newly resurfaced memories that telling Otabek about his family had brought up.

"Oh, fuck. I should probably see when the next flight is that I can get is so that I can practice for the Cup of China."

"You sure that you don't want to stay in Moscow any longer?"

"Yeah, it won't help for me to be here, Grandfather is recovering well, and being here will just lead to me having too much time to dwell on my thoughts and my fears of losing him. Skating will be able to distract me from my thoughts. I need that right now."

"Okay, make sure that you take time to dwell on your thoughts too though. It's not good to block them up until you can't take it anymore, okay? Call me if you need to talk."

"I'll try, thanks, bye, I should probably try and find a flight."

"Goodbye Yura, I love you," Otabek said, feeling like Yuri needed to know that he was loved right now, and when he saw Yuri smile softly, he knew that he was right.

"Goodbye, I love you too Beka," Yuri said before hanging up and searching for flights.