Chapter Twenty-Six
"I should get going." Liam said after a while. The sun had now set outside, the room we were laying in now dark.
"You can stay you know... I don't mind."
"I... I need to get home Harry. Zayn is probably worried and..." I nodded, hoping to show I understood...
"Okay... I'll walk you out." I stood up from the floor, flipping the light switch to illuminate the room. Liam followed close behind me as we walked out of my home. I took him to his car, waving goodbye as he drove away. I stood outside for a little while, not really caring as the cold air bit at my skin.
I just stood there, looking at the street. It reminded me of the night I first got Niall to open up to me again...
The street lights illuminated the path, and all I wanted to do was follow it...
But I didn't.
Instead, I went back to my home.
"I thought he'd never leave." I stiffened at the voice... It was all too familiar.
It was poision to my ears, and I felt my heart pick up it's pace.
"I find it cute how he's still whoring around after all this time. You'd think he'd realize that he's never gonna have a stable relationship like that. He always did like you more than me." I felt his breath on the back of my neck, making me freeze. His fingers moved a few curls away from the base of my neck.
"I can understand why though... I mean you are beautiful Harry. Of course... Niall was never one to share, but with him gone now... I can have you all to myself." His lips were then pressed against my skin, and that's when I pushed him off.
"Don't. Don't you fucking dare bring him up then touch me! Don't even come near me!"
"Harry, Harry... You think you can just push me around like that? You think I"m just gonna allow that? You got another thing coming for you." His fingers were then wrapped around my wrist. The cold making them feel like ice against my skin.
"You know... I was with him before he died. I was there as he lay there taking in his dying breath. I was there, and guess where you were Harry? You weren't even aware he was dying. Do you remember that phone call Harry?"
"Let go of me Louis."
"Do you remember it Harry?" I took in a steady breath, turning around to look at him. His eyes were cold, emotionless. They were the eyes that belonged to the devil himself.
"I'm gonna ask you one last time Harry, do you remember?"
"Yes I fucking remember!" I screamed at him, wrenching my wrist away from his grip.
"I fucking remember! Now stop fucking telling me that you were there. Don't make me remember that I wasn't. Don't make me feel like I didn't save him.... I fucking know already." I blinked back tears, not wanting Louis to see me be weak.
"Well then, do you want me to remind you that he wanted you there? That he begged for you? Why else do you think he called you?"
"Stop telling me lies Louis. He didn't want me fucking there. HE NEVER EVEN WANTED ME IN THE FIRST PLACE."
"Is that so? Then explain to me why he gave me this?" He opened the palm of my hand, placing in it an envelope. My name was written in Niall's handwriting.
"Why are you giving me this?"
"I've done a lot of bad shit, and I'm not going to say I'm sorry for it. Nor am I going to say I don't regret it. I used to be so jealous of you and Niall... You were so happy... and god so perfect for each other. I had that once... I know I did, but I fucked up. Dammit Harry I fucked up in the worst way imaginable.... and I guess that's what I wish I could take back. I fucked everything up Harry, and I don't want you to tell me I'm right, nor do I want your forgiveness. I just need to let you know that.... Niall really did love you. I know it may not seem like it... but he did."
"If he did love me, he wouldn't have left."
"You know what? The same could've been said for you." And with that Louis left, his hands in his pockets as he walked out into the cold night. I stood at my door, watching his retreating back. When I could no longer see him, I went inside. I glanced down at the envelope that sat in my hand, half of me wanted to open it... the other wanted me to keep it sealed.
For I feared if I opened it... My heart would break all over again.
But I went against it.
My fingers ran gingerly over the sealed area of the envelope. I hooked my index finger under the small bubbled area. I ripped open the envelope, pulling out the piece of paper... only to drop it to the ground. I placed a hand over my mouth as I felt a sob start to build. I couldn't even look at his handwriting without wanting to cry.
So, with teary eyes... I knelt down and picked up.
To my dearest Harry,
I honestly don't know why I'm writing you this... I guess it's just so you can know that everything is gonna be alright.
I'm writing you this because... I want you to know that despite everything... you're gonna be okay. I know you will.
You wanna know why? Cause you're stronger than you think Haz...
Goddammit... You're the strongest person I've ever known.
How could you ever be weak? You had to keep dealing with my stubborn ass...
You're stronger than I will ever be. You stepped up when I was too much of a goddamn coward to do so. You took in a child that wasn't even yours to begin with, when all I did was pretend it was spawn.
That's how I know you're strong.
And that's how I know you're gonna be okay.
The same can't be said for me. I don't think I'm gonna be okay... Not without you.
So that's really the main reason why I'm writing this...
I'm going to fix myself, like I told you I was...
I don't know really how long it's gonna take, a month? a year? Maybe two? I don't know, but I do know that it doesn't matter how long... cause in the end I'll be with you once more.
That's all I've ever wanted Harry...
To be with you.
So, catch me if you can Styles.. Catch me if you can.
Niall xx
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Dedication:
Vertex
I loved their comment about homosexual penguins, really warmed my heart. Also that MJ profile pic has my stamp of approval.
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Connie xx
PS: I love you
PPS: If you see this: Comment something about this story that bugs you? I'll start with how goddamn stubborn Niall is through majority of this story xx.
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Make Me Break (n.h. + h.s.)(Punk!Niall)
Fanfiction~|How can you break something that's already broken?|~ "You've already taken eveything from me, what more could you possibly want?!" "You. I fucking want you, but that's the only thing you won't give me." "You had me, but you lost that chance...
