SSS [III] (COMPLETED)

Part 20

Ganoon ba ako ka-rupok? Na kaya kong pilitin siyang baliin ang kung ano man ang nauna niyang desisyon for my own gratification? Siguro. Was this some sort of powerplay for me? To please my pride? Maybe.

There was just something so... reassuring about an uptight man who prefers keeping to himself. A high-strung man who prefers sticking by the rules. That convincing him to do things in accordance to my bidding, against from all his other strict implementations is making me questionmyself. But, reassuring, nonetheless.

Extremely reassuring, to the point of practically begging him for that kind of comfort in our pseudo-intimacy. The promise of the secrecy allured me so much it made me more than willing to be deaf to his principles. It made me more than willing to deal with the possible consequences head-on, just for that particular soft taste of pleasure.

Or maybe it's because it was the first for the two of us.

It was comforting to know that I had completely more experiences than him when it comes to anything... sexual...

This was definitely powerplay.

Napatitig akong muli sa natutulog niyang likod. Nagising ako ng madaling-araw para mag-banyo. Gigisingin ko na sana siya para lumipat na sa sala. Para sa pag-gising ni Lola ay hindi niya maabutang 'di naman nagalaw 'yong sofa-bed doon.

Pang-limang gabi na nila ni Yosef na makitulog sa amin, at pang-limang gabi ko na din siya kinakalabit papunta sa kwarto ko. Sef had been feeling sick lately kaya si Lola muna ang nag-aalaga.

"Hey..." mahinang yugyog ko sa kanya.

Katulad ng mga naunang gabi ay nakatalukbong nanaman siya't nakaharap sa dingding tuwing natatapos kami. Ewan ko ba. The last time I asked him ay talagang ganoon daw siya matulog. E, noong ilang beses nanigas lang naman yung buong katawan niya while he had his eyes closed. Akala ko nga na-stupefy na siya ng sarili niyang...uhm...release.

"What," aniya, still not looking at me.

"Gising na..." kulbit ko sa kanya.

Agad naman siyang tumayo, wore his clothes at lumabas na ng kwarto. I tried going back to sleep. Usually ay ginigising ako ni Lola para sa aming morning jog, pero yun nga ay kailangang nakatutok siya kay Sef at hindi niya pwedeng iwan kahit minuto man lang. Ganoon maka-bantay si Lola kapag mayroong may sakit sa bahay. Every second was crucial.

Naiisip ko pa lang noong nagkasakit si Lolo ay sumisikip na iyong dibdib ko.

I went out of my room just in time for breakfast. Prez was helping out with preparing food habang ako naman ay dumiretso sa mesa para makapaghalumbaba. Pang-limang umaga na rin ito na hindi kami sa Bungalow kumakain ng agahan, since Prez needs to be in school hours before the event para madoublecheck ang lahat-lahat.

Ako naman ito, bumubuntot lang.

"May I please make the rounds with you today?" I pleaded.

Naglalakad na kami ni Prez patungong Council Office. Masyado pang maaga kaya kahit na final day na ng University Week ay wala pa rin naman na tao sa paligid. Anyway, alas-diyez pa naman talaga magsisimula ang event kahit na alas-otso ang nakasulat sa formal program. Filipino time.

"Come on! Buong week akong nagkulong dito sa office! Nakakapagod din na ako halos ang nagfinalize ng planning, production and sponsorship tapos nasa background lang ako. Sayang effort!" giit ko pa. "To think na nasa Senior Year ako pero halos lahat ng events ay wala naman akong natunghayan!"

We had very busy days. The University Week was getting everybody hyped. It was our chance to showcase whatever we have, anila. Syempre, ay dahil nasa Council ako, sobrang busy din naman ako sa mga kung anu-anong assistance na maialay ko. Pero hindi ko naman inexpect na buong U-week akong kulong sa office!