i'm a cheerleader.

fourteen

-Rebecca's p.o.v.-

We walked on the trails for a while. Talking about things from why taco shells are the colour that they are to why we exist and our significance in the entirety of the universe we lived in and beyond. As we talked we never stopped holding one another's hand. I didn't even think of Brandon when we held hands. He felt irrelevant. CJ held my hand in hers so delicately like it was a priceless jewel that needed to be held with caution, yet at the same time so tightly that I never wanted to let her go. As time passed and it got colder, I invited her back to my house and she gladly accepted. We walked back to my car and I let go of her hand as she sat down and I closed her door. It felt like I was missing something the second we lost contact. I walked to my car and sat down and after we put our seat belts on I started the car and we were off. I usually drove with one hand and used the other to control the radio or had it on the center console. CJ traced her fingers along the top of my hand and wrapped her middle and ring finger around my palm. I opened my hand and she intertwined our fingers again. I felt a feeling of satisfaction I only felt holding her hand. I felt complete. We didn't speak, we knew words would ruin it. We sat in silence with light music playing on the car ride home. As soon as we arrived in my driveway, I stopped my car and sat in silence for a moment, never letting go of CJ's hand. She let go and I turned to look at her and she leaned in and kissed me. I had kissed boys before but it felt like I was having my first kiss. I was breathless, and sat still for a moment before wrapping my hand around her neck and leaning into it. After a moment CJ pulled away. It felt like it lasted for an eturnity, but at the same time for only a second. I craved more even though I wasn't attracted to CJ like that. It was just because I had never kissed Brandon. It had been a long time since I did that with someone. That's what I told myself. CJ and I sat in silence.

"Was that bad for you?" She asked me. I shook my head without saying a word. "Why do you look so angry then?" She asked me. I was confused. Did I look angry? I wasn't mad at all.

"I'm not mad I'm just in shock. I didn't know you liked me like that." I stated.

"I could say the same for you." She said to me and I sighed.

"I'm not ga-." I started before she cut me off.

"I know. You're a cheerleader." She said before getting out of the car and slamming the door behind her. I let out a sigh. I didn't understand what I did wrong but I sure did something.