Don't go || m.c

7

"Only in my dreams I wrap my arms around you."

The last thing in my book that I read keeps repeating itself, I lie in bed staring at the celling, I should get up but I can't, I feel a massive weight on my chest, pushing me down, down below the surface so I'm drowning. I pick up my book to read something to distract myself but it just reminds me.

"When you're in my dreams,

I want to sleep forever.

I don't want to wake up

to find that you're not

there. I want you by

me.

Can I just sleep forever?

Just so I can see you forever

as long as you are asleep.

As long as you're

in my dreams,

I know I'll be okay."

-KRM

I don't want to feel like this but I can't help it, it's killing me from the inside out, how could some little crush hurt this much, it's crushing me, that's where it gets its name from I guess. I stay in bed all day crying, why doesn't he like me? I thought he did.

Tears tears and more tears until I have to go to work, I drag myself into the shower and get ready, just before I leave I get a bottle of vodka and take a shot, it rushes through me and momentarily heals my brokenness, I know this is a bad reason to be drinking and I'm meant to be sober when I'm working but one shot wont hurt, as usual I walk to the uni, Harry drives me to the bar, I thank him then I start my shift.

As I'm refilling glasses I realise it's not just Michael that I haven't heard from but Ashton, I wonder what he's doing? Is he with Michael and if so, why can't I be? Tyler tell's me I have a brake but I don't leave the bar, I sit there and eat peanuts.

"I haven't seen you here before," a half drunk guy says.

"Funny because I work here," I say, causing him to momentarily use his charm.

"Well since you're not working can I buy you a drink?"

"I have to work in half an hour so better not," I decline and continue to do so as he tests different pick up lines on me, "time's up," I say and start working again.

At one the guy I was talking to before and three of his friends are still here, "time to go!" I call out, they leave and I lock the bar and start my journey home, I feel someone watching me, I turn around and to my horror the guy from the bar is following me with his friends following close behind, he grabs my wrist and pulls me backwards, I stumble but gain my balance.

"Ever had a fivesome?" He hisses, his breath smells strong of alcohol making me almost gag.

They drag me through the street, my screams silenced by a cloth wrapped around my head, I see a shadow from across the street run towards us, I'm dropped on my head and blackness engulfs me.

Ashton's POV

I know I'm a creep but I'm following Lil home from work, just like yesterday, I don't want something bad happening to her. Four other guys are also following her, one grabs her wrist, I wait to see what they're doing, they drag her down the middle of the road with a gag in her mouth. I run across the street, a guy holding up her head drops her and she gets knocked out, I see red as my fist connects with his face.

"Fuck off! Leave her alone!" I scream at them.

"You can join us if you like," a guy offers, dropping her legs and stumbling, they're all drunk. I punch the guy that spoke to me, causing him to fall backwards.

"Didn't you hear me, I told you to fuck off!" I yell.

"We found her so why don't you take your own advice and fuc-" I cut him off by punching him, I don't really like getting into fights with people but if they dare to hurt Lil I don't care what I do to them.

I pick up Lil and carry her bridal style towards her apartment, I get there and as much as I want to put her in my car, take her to my house and look after her, I know I can't so I knock on the door loudly.

"Who is it?" Jade groans, I obviously woke her up.

"Hurry," I say impatiently.

She opens the door and gasps when she sees her roommate, I explain what happened apart from me following her, she makes me carry her to the bathroom so she can wash the blood from her head and face that she got when she was dropped on her head, Jade is surprisingly good at bandaging Lil up. After she's done I carry her to her room and put her in bed.

"I'm sorry they were going to hurt you," I whisper, "I will never let them touch you again, never."

"Mike," Lil says in her sleep.

"Ashton," I say, getting up but not before planting a kiss on her forehead, I spin around and jump, Jade is standing in the door way, "shit, what do you want?"

"Do you like her?" She asks shocked.

"Yeah but don't tell her, don't tell her I was here either," I say, she looks confused but nods her head and doesn't ask any further questions. I wait until Jade leaves and I hear her footsteps disappear into her room before I look back at Lil, "good night," I whisper before leaving. I sit in my car for about an hour before driving off, back into hell, well it feels like that, I've only met Lil but I can't stop thinking about her, I miss her so much and the worst part is I know where she lives, where she works, where she hangs out but I can't hangout with her.

Lil's POV

Saturday morning comes around and Jade forces me to get up, forces as in tries to pull me out of bed but needs to call Louis to come over and help, he picks me up and drops me in the bathroom, I give up and have a shower, I don't want to go shopping but they force me, Louis carries me to his car. We meet up with Niall, Jesy and Leigh and for once I don't care where we are, I just want to be with Michael but since I can't do that I just want to go home.

"This is boring, can we go somewhere else?" Niall complains as we go into another dress store, even though Jesy, Leigh and Jade are punk they like trying on cute pretty dresses.

"Yeah, can we?" I ask, the three girls and Louis chorus a "no."

"Hey Niall, did you want to hang out, back at my place?" I ask.

"Yeah, guys we're going to Lil's," we run out of the store and through the mall, we get in Niall's car and drive off.

Niall pulls up and we climb out, as soon as I open the front door Niall rushes in and goes straight to the fridge to get a beer, he calls out asking if I want one and I reply with a yes. He comes in and passes me my bottle of cold, refreshing beer, "I'm just going to the bathroom," I say, leaving my drink on the table. I walk back to the living room to the smell of Niall smoking pot, it's going to be a fun night.

I don't smoke anything but get a bit high from breathing in Niall's smoke, Jade gets back at five and says she's going to the frat party, Niall sits up. Jade walks out in a tight short dress and takes Niall, leaving me alone, I crawl into bed and let the tears come. I was so stupid, latching onto someone I didn't even know, for falling for a stranger, the only thing that can calm me down are my poems but now they only remind me of my pain. Sleep comes and once again I get to see Michael in my dreams.