Don't go || m.c

11

Luke stands at the front door, he has obviously seen us but he just smiles, showing no awkwardness at all, maybe he is use to this stuff, a voice that sounds a lot like Ashton's says inside my head, I force the thought out of my brain.

I walk over to the door and make up my mind that I'll act like it's no big deal, tons of people had seen me with different guys as we make our way to a bedroom, most the time I'd lost a lot more clothing than just shoes, but this is a big deal, I was making out with Michael, I could shout it from the rooftops except someone would probably hear me and I'd go all blushy, a feeling I've recently come to despise. I thought all that while I took only six steps, I open the door and step to the side to allow Luke in.

"Hey," I greet casually.

"Hey Lil, sorry if I was interrupting," he says, the first time he shows any expression caused by seeing Michael and I moments ago. Keep it cool, keep it cool, it's just a guy that walked in before you had sex with Micha- oh shit, no don't blush, stop smiling like that, I SAID DON'T BLUSH! I scream in my head, keep it cool, it's just like making out with Niall on Zayn's couch that time when they shared an apartment and Zayn walked in, that's all.

"Don't be," I smile, my expression telling Luke that as soon as he leaves we'll go straight back to what we were doing. I mentally pat myself on the back, avoid eye contact with Michael and you'll be fine, I tell myself, but if you avoid eye contact it'll be seen as purposely avoiding eye contact because if you look you'll blush, my subcountuse talks back, I dare to look up at Michael and manage to smirk without dying because he is so incredibly hot.

"Thought you'd be here," Luke says to Michael who seems a bit infuriated by Luke's presence.

"What are you doing?"

"Calum and Ashton are hanging out today and I didn't want to be alone," Luke pouts, my bottom lip trembles, he is so cute. I decide Luke can stay here for a bit, we watch tv together but end up talking over the top of it, I get up to retrieve Michael and my beers and to fetch Luke one as well, while I'm in the kitchen I smile like an idiot. "Thanks," Luke says when I hand him the cold beer, Michael and mine have already gone warm.

"Dude," Michael says.

"You guys can continue, I'll just wait here."

Half way through our convocation I look over at Michael, I stare right at his lips until I have to look away or I'll get caught, I feel really frisky and fight to stay still, the last time I'd been this long without sex was when I was a virgin and my hormones wont let me forget it. I alternate between looking at the tv and looking at Luke because I know if I look only for a millisecond at Michael I'll straddle him right away.

What has gotten into you? I ask myself, I think for a moment before remembering my period is due in a week, I feel like crying for no reason what so ever except that my period is fucking with my emotions, eventually Luke leaves, letting himself out. I turn to Michael and as I guessed, I straddle him, pulling his shirt up so our lips can meet in a competition of who gets control.

I pull his T-shirt over his head to expose more of his pale skin, Michael somehow manages to take my shorts off and leave them on the floor, I pull him closer in desperation, he rubs the outside of my panties and the moan that passes from my lips to his is the evidence of how desperate I really am, he pushes my panties to the side and slips two fingers in, my head falls backwards and my mouth opens to let out all the moans it had been containing, Michael starts nipping at my neck, I buck my hips forward, he lets me fuck his fingers, he inserts another finger, he holds my waist tightly with his left hand, curling his fingers on his right hand, I fall forward and rest my head on his shoulder, seeming to loose all my energy as I fall apart, I come on his fingers and he brings them up to my lips so I can taste myself.

"I want the first time I taste you to be when my head is between your thighs," he says seductively, "but right now I really need to be inside you," Michael stands, still holding me up as we make our second attempt to get to my room, I'm much more breathless than before so I keep pulling back from his lips to get more air. The front door opens and closes, Michael doesn't hear it and I can't see if anyones there, before I can do anything it's reopened and slammed shut, the sound of someone clearing their throat impatiently follows, I'm placed on my feet instantly but it isn't until Michael has spun around and I've stepped forward slightly that I see who it is.

Jade stands with her arms crossed over her chest, glaring at Michael until he retreats to my bedroom, I pick up my shorts and put them on before she starts talking, "Lil, you can't sleep with him, what if he leaves you in the morning?"

"Not you as well, I've already heard it from Ashton," I reply, I can already feel the absence from Michael.

"I actually wanted to talk to you," she says quietly, I don't say anything so she continues, "you were blushing when Michael talked about fucking you and you giving him a blow job, why?"

"I don't know, it's so weird, I've never felt like it before and I hate it."

"No offence but you're a whore, they don't blush."

"No offence taken and I know, it's just, I don't know."

"You love him," she holds a finger up to silence me so she can finish, "everyone can tell, everyone knows."

"But I thought I would be the first person that would know?"

"I guess but since you've never loved someone how could you know what it feels like," I have nothing to say, do I love Michael? It's true that I don't know what love feels like but I still thought I'd know when I felt it, "I'm going out, I just wanted to talk to you."

I walk slowly to my room, "I um," I'm not sure what to say, I'm so overwhelmed by what Jade just said.

"Are you okay?" He sits up, I nod and force a smile but before we can do anything else the front door opens and slams shut, "again?" Michael says, rolling his eyes. Ashton bursts in the room.

"Michael, I need to talk to you," he says, trying to stay calm, Michael gets up and follows him out, I sit down on my bed, trying not to hear the conversation going on.

"Why her?" Ashton says, still trying to stay calm but I can hear the fire behind his words.

"Ashton-"

"No, answer my question!"

No answer.

"Please Michael, I can't sit back and watch you brake her heart."

Still no answer.

After a while the front door closes and a car engine comes to life, I walk out but see the last glimpse of the car with both Ashton and Michael siting in the front. I am so confused, why would Ashton care anyway if I got my heart broken,for some reason Sunday flashes in my mind, the day I imagined Ashton talking to me just before Michael came back, he told me he loved me but he seemed so real, this is just giving me a head ache. Jade doesn't come back, I guess she's at a party, I eat some pizza before going to bed, I'm just so tired.