He was a mess, but hell... So were you.
When you were torn from each other when the prison fell, you couldn't find strength in day to day. And Daryl, the guilt of not protecting you like he promised ate him alive.
Nights were the worst, when you'd both be staring up at the same night sky. The same stars and the same moon, but not knowing where either of you were. With him wondering if you were still alive, and you wondering if you'd ever get the chance to see him again.
When days passed like weeks, and every step you took felt like walking a mile, that was when you knew your faith you had held strongly onto was slipping. Running on empty.
When everything reminded him of you, from seeing a bird resting in it's nest singing a new morning song, to a wildflower growing by itself deep into the woods. Every turn, every road... Somehow his thoughts were always lead back to you.
Sleep was never easy to catch either, even if you could fall asleep... The dreams were sometimes worse than the reality. Whether it was reliving and replaying of happy memories together, or glimpses into a future that was all and only would be a dream.
You believed deep down he was alive, you knew it. That wasn't the thing that worried you, it was the not getting to see him one last time. That was the part you couldn't bare, live or die... All you wanted was to get to see his face. His beautiful breathtaking blue eyes once more. Just one last look into them, one more touch of his lips on your skin.
He didn't know, that's what was breaking him apart. Daryl knew you were strong, but sometimes in this world... Strong just isn't strong enough. The not knowing was the worst part, not knowing if you were alive or dead somewhere.
You could feel yourself begin to slip, as you were hungry, dehydrated and alone. Voices beginning to soon in your head and echoing in your ears. The hallucinations of fresh water and of family fog your already weak mind.
He was shut down, which pissed Beth off. She knew all he needed was to release all the emtions he crammed down inside himself. If he was hungry, he'd eat. Thirsty, he'd drink. Missing you... That was a different story. He just couldn't bring himself to feel, not yet anyway.
It wasn't until the end of the second week that he finally broke. After losing Beth, it only brought the tears on him to call harder. Crying for her, crying for you. Crying for everything and everyone that ever left him.
You however, you broke every day. Day, night didn't matter. You cried for Daryl, you cried for just a small feeling of safety. You cried for the mornings you woke up in his arms, you cried for the nights he kissed you goodnight. You cried for everything you feared you'd never get to experience or feel again.
Daryl was never one to have hope. He had it in the beginning when he went on days knowing he'd find Carol's little girl; until he didn't and lost that feeling. He had it when you all had found the prison; a safe haven in a world crumbling to pieces. He lost it the day the governor rolled right up to the gates. But most of all, when you came walking into his life... That was the most powerful sense of hope He had ever felt. Finding himself love; something he never experienced in his life and especially didn't foreseeing happen at a time like this.
You had hope, all your life you had it. And when life was falling apart, you didn't lose it, instead you held tighter to it. Through every battle, through every loss you stayed hopeful that one day all this would mean something. That every life lost wouldn't just be a dead body, but that their deaths would mean something.
But this... You didn't care about the fact that the prison had been destroyed or the fact that you didn't know if this was the end of the line for you. You lost your hope the moment you lost Daryl.
Daryl's belief that you were still out there; fighting and staying alive only grew deeper when he found Carl, Rick, and Michonne. Finding them, it was like finding a lighthouse in the middle of the ocean. Calling him back to the possibility that you were out there.
You seemed to slow down with each passing day, not even knowing anymore if you were traveling more than a couple miles each day.
Having a plan, having a place he could look and have a chance of finding you at was enough to keep him going. Just a little bit longer, the signs for Terminus just keeping up the thought that you could be waiting for him.
You saw the signs, but all you saw was false hope. There was no sanctuary in this world, not anymore. But you followed the tracks, not to get there where they led but to have something to keep walking towards. You didn't know what was there, but you knew you had to keep walking in some sort of direction. Rather than easily give up.
Daryl didn't quite know if he ever believed this place was going to be like the prison or anything close to a sanctuary but this he definitely wasn't expecting. Ending up trapped in a small train cart, although reunited with the people he thought were gone, they were still trapped.
Looking at everyone back together, and seeing Glenn being reunited with his wife and getting to be with her even through this... Made him feel even more crushed that you weren't here.
Trudging along in the dusty dirt that only kicked off your shoes and stuck to your sweat covered skin, you could see something in the distance. Some sort of smoke, and what earlier sounding like an explosion.
Normally, you wouldn't venture towards it. But instead get away as the signs pointed to danger, but in that moment something in your mind... No your heart, was telling you to keep walking that way.
Although the slight sense of relief and feel of togetherness came to him after escaping that death trap, he couldn't help but feel even more negitave about his chances of finding you.
Carol had saved them, and he felt a moment of happiness inside him to see her alive. But to realize that he may never feel that about you, only broke the last piece of his remaining whole.
A cough of a sickly tired person, and the snapping of a brach causing every one to turn their heads in the direction of the noise.
His first thoughts and feelings are on the side of defense, but when he sees you everything softens.
The eyes that only for a split second looked ready to fight the person approaching, soon softened as a slight gasp escapes his lips.
You wonder a moment, walking past the shade of the trees if this is all real. Or if this is the hallucination that truly kills you.
But when person who had haunted your dreams day in and day out runs to you, picking your weak and brittle body into his arms... You know it's real.
The smell of sweat and pine on his skin, and the deep scent of cigarette smoke seeped into the fabric of his clothes.
The way his long hair brushes against your cheek as his hand holds the back of your head. It isn't before long that you feel his body shaking, his fingers that are tangled in your hair tremble. But his shoulders shake as he cries into your shoulder.
You hadn't even noticed that when he picked you up, you had instantly wrapped your legs around his waist. Habit you suppose taking over your body.
Daryl hardly ever cried, but when he did he made sure no one but you saw. So him holding you now, sobbing hard into your skin only proves that he was just as lost without you as you were without him.
Setting you down, and pulling away from the wet spot he left on the corner of your shirt, his hands cup your face.
"God," He breathes out, his voice screaming his vulnerability. "don't you go doing that again. Don't you go leavin me."
Daryl's voice cracks, as tears flow down your face like a steady stream.
Finding him after almost reaching the point that you were ready to give up, to you... It was like finding a bright shinning angel in your darkest hour.
It didn't matter that the rest of the group was seeing this intimate moment between the two of you-- no matter how hard they tried to look away-- all that mattered was that you had found him. And he had found you.
You found each other.
A/N: okay... I'm crying. Seriously❤
