Breaking stones (Justin Bieber )

(Chapter 44) Save Me From Myself

Chapter 44 Save Me From Myself 

Oceans POV

I lifted up my foot slowly and my heart beat raced

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you “I heard a voice say I opened my eyes and turned my head

“Don’t try and stop me Andrew “I cried

“I’m not going to, but I’m going to say this, Ocean you have so much to live for, you have two beautiful children in America that need you and I know you need them, you may not have Mr. Bieber anymore but you still have them, so I suggest you get down from there and call him” Andrew said walking a little closer

“He won’t let me see them; he hates me for what I done “I cried

“I know about the whole baby situation and it’s not even that bad “he said

“No it’s not that, I told him that I never loved him and he hates me for that, I promise I didn’t mean it “I cried harder

“Ocean I need you to come down Please, I am begging you now “he said looking very concerned

“I don’t want to, I want to die, this inset me anymore I know I used to be like this before but I was never this bad, I actually enjoy breaking peoples heart, when I did it before it made me sad but not now, I laugh and it amuses me, I don’t know why this happens to me it just dose and I hate myself for being such a heartless bitch for having a heart made out of stone, I hate myself and I have nothing left to live for so what’s the point in carrying on, I still love him and I always will and he will never leave my heart I know he won’t, but me and him are over forever, he’s getting married and he’s going to finally have the happiness that I could never give him” I cried I looked down and slowly lowered myself so that I was now sitting on the edge

“ Ocean I need you to get down from the edge DONT YOU DARE JUMP” I heard a familiar voice say, it definitely wasn’t Andrew , I turned my head slightly and it was Andrew he had phoned Justin and he had put him on loud speaker, and I guess he head everything

“Justin is that you “I asked to reassure myself

“Yeah it’s me, You don’t need to do this, I need you stay away from that edge, I know how it feels to want end you life remember I have been there so many times, it’s unbelievable, you feel like you have nothing left and you feel like no one cares about you and you start to look at yourself in such a horrible way and you lose that happy feeling altogether, but It doesn’t have to be like that forever  things will get better I promise you that they will” he said

“ I can’t do this anymore, why is it always so hard for me, why did you bring me into your world, I could be happy with parker and his little girl, but NO I’m sitting at the top of a tall building trying to end my own life, No actually it was my fault I’m sorry I should have listened to your mom when she said stay away from you because you where trouble, I’m Just sorry for every I put you through...I still love you and I think I always will” I said and there was no reply for a moment just silence then I whispered to myself quietly “I’m sorry mom for letting you down, but at least I will be with you now” I said I looked up into the sky and smiled a little

“Ocean Please I’m begging you to get down, you have everything to live for I mean Andrew is deeply in love with you and your great at your job, you have two beautiful children and you have the life most people would dream of having” he said distressed and  agitated

“I don’t want to go back to being that person I was “I sniffled

“Then don’t become that person, let people help you, let Andrew help you, I can help but its hard when you’re so far away “he said

“Why do you even care you hate me now, you hate me” I said slowly standing up again, my hair blew in the wind and so did my dress, I stood there and took of a heal one by one and I threw them and then they hit the floor, I turned around and faced Andrew

“ I don’t hate you, I never hated and I never will, Ocean I know I shouldn’t say this but I do still love you, maybe not as much as I did before but I know you will always have a place in my heart, so I need you to get down “ Andrew walked close up to me with the phone

“ I can’t move Justin, my body and mind wants to be up here where I’m standing, I wish I could just get down like you said but I can’t move” I said I closed my eyes

“Ocean you saved my life now let me save yours “he shouted down the phone

“I’m sorry “I said and then I fell...