Pretty Hurts. •Jaegan•

•four•

Justin's pov.

I fluttered my eyes open, where was I? I looked down and saw a hospital gown? What? I'm so confused. I looked around the room. White walls. A window. One door to the bathroom that was closed. Another door that probably led into a hallway. A door which was probably a closest. I had a IV needle in my arm, then there was a whole bunch of medical stuff to my right. And on the left, there was two chairs and a table. The second door opened, and a nurse came in. She had a clipboard with a pen and scrubs on.

"Oh your awake." She said surprised.

"Why am I here?" I asked, as she started checking all the medical stuff on my right.

"Oh, honey, I'll get the young man in the hallway to explain that to you, he was the one who brought you here." She said and marked down some things on her clip board.

"Okay I'll go get him." She said and left to the hallway. Who brought me here?

"Hi Justin." I looked up and my eyes came upon Rizzy or Cliff. Danny's best friend. Oh so I'm guessing Danny's been notified...

"Hi Rizzy." I sighed. I looked down, I know he's disappointed but about what?

"Justin, why? Why'd you do it?" What did I do?

"Rizzy, I don't know what I did, what'd I do?" I asked timidly.

"You tried to kill you self. You texted me to help you. I came as soon as possible. Justin I was so scared." Oh.

"So why'd you do it?" Cliff asked me concerned.

"I-I don't know... Well I do... But..." I couldn't say it. I didn't want to. I haven't even been bullied for a long time, three days. But I've already had depression from before. And anxiety. I just hate myself. Being transgender. I just want to die.

"I didn't want to live anymore, I don't want to, I'm being bullied at school, you know I had depression before, and anxiety, I hate myself Rizzy. I want to die." I cried. He rushed to my side and held me. I just cried and cried. I was so tired.

"Justin, I would say it's okay, but it's honestly not, I thought you were better, what happened to being strong? Come on where's my strong boy?" He whispered. I cried. I heard a gasp from the doorway. I looked up and saw Danny, my mom and Jack.

"Justin!!!!" Danny cried and rushed over to me. He took me from Cliff, and held me. Jack came over too and cuddle me, it was a big cuddle party. My mom and Cliff were talking to a doctor. I was still crying.

"Justin, you had me worried sick!" Jack exclaimed.

"Never do that again." He and Danny cried. I felt so bad. But I was tired and I started to drift off. And I fell asleep.

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When I woke up my mom was there. By my side. Looking at me. She noticed I was awake.

"Hi baby, Danny and your friend went to go get breakfast." She gave a forced smile.
I felt so bad, you could see her tear stains, her sadness. I moved over to her and opened my arms. She hugged me.

"Justin, I thought I lost you. Justin I know I've failed as a parent, but I love you, I love you so much. I know the divorce was hard. I know." She cried. Seeing her cry made me feel like shit. My mother, the one who gave birth to me, who watched me grow up, was there when I first spoke and walked, when I first cut my hair. She's sacrificed so much for me.

"I'm sorry mom, I didn't mean to. I didn't want to." I cried. She rubbed my back and after a tear fest we both pulled apart and wiped our tears. Danny and Jack came after that. We ate. I found out I could be released today. But I would have to go to consoling.
Which was fine. I've been to consoling before. So we left after signing me out. Jack missed school because of me, but I would have to go back Monday. It was Friday when I came home. So Jack missed two days of school. Danny came home early for me. My mom missed two days of work. Wow. Sacrifice.