Roommates & Soulmates

Ch24: Jace's Almost

Jace once again found himself sitting in class watching the back of Clary's head. Like usual, Simon was sitting beside her. Jace wasn't listening to the teacher. He'd just barely passed the last class he'd had with Clary and he was sure this one would be no different. He couldn't think with her there.

"I know you didn't go home with lusty," Sebastian whispered into his ear. Jace jumped; he had known Sebastian was there, of course having arrived to class with him, but Jace thought his ditching the other night had gone unnoticed. He turned giving his friend a confused and hopefully innocent look.

"I ran into her on my way out of the bar," Sebastian explained. "I thought maybe you found someone else, but no, here you are staring at that stupid redhead again!"

"Her name is Clary," Jace ground out through his teeth. Sebastian didn't reply since the teacher turned around and gave them a reproachful look, but Jace knew he was in for an earful when class ended.

And sure enough, the second the teacher dismissed them, Sebastian started talking again.

"This is bordering on insane, my crazy friend," Sebastian was saying as they left the classroom together. Jace didn't reply. "She doesn't want you. She has a boyfriend. She isn't even close to hot enough to be worth half of your wallowing!"

Jace could have given Sebastian a very detailed description of how very attractive Clary was, but he sensed that wouldn't help the situation.

"Sure at first it was kinda funny," Sebastian complained. "I was even willing to laugh at you after a few weeks, but the joke is so old now, Jace! I hoped Christmas would knock some sense into you." Jace sighed, but had nothing to add as they entered the cafeteria and started eating lunch.

"But no, we returned from your mother's wonderful Christmas dinner to find you still staring at the same god damn girl!" Sebastian's monologue was becoming background noise to Jace's lack of enthusiasm about his lunch. Jace couldn't help but feel small while Sebastian schooled him. "And worse, you keep ditching me and not even to do something else. You just sit and wallow. It's not good for you Jace."

"I know," Jace said.

"You can't keep fighting with yourself like this," Sebastian exclaimed. "Either take her or drop her." Jace sensed that with this last declaration, Sebastian was finished with his speech.

"You done?" Jace asked.

"For now," Sebastian replied.

"I have wrestling practice in a while, but do you want to hit the gym first?" Jace asked. He decided to not talk to Sebastian about Clary anymore. He knew nothing could change the fact that Jace wanted Clary -- he didn't even see other woman anymore -- and Sebastian didn't want to hear that. But Jace also knew he had failed to get her to notice him. He wished he could move on, but even the thought of calling Trinity had lost its appeal.

Sebastian agreed and they spent an enjoyable hour at the gym before Jace went to practice. All the exercise had Jace's mind calm and relaxed when he arrived back at his dorm room.

But once Jace arrived, the anxiety returned. Inwardly he prayed Magnus wasn't there as he opened the door. He didn't want to be faced with a happy couple at the moment, but the room was empty. Collapsing on his bed with a sigh, Jace let his fears and insecurities consume him. Sebastian's lecturing and Alec's absence were the final straw on top of his ridiculous Clary obsession to make Jace never want to get out of bed again. Alec was either done with him or too busy to hang out. Clary still didn't know he existed, let alone cared, and Sebastian didn't understand him. It was a strange feeling, to have the person you thought you were closest to in the world suddenly be the one on the outside. Jace had never felt so alone before. He did the reading for his class tomorrow, curled up in bed and wasted some time on the internet before falling asleep early, hoping Alec would be home tomorrow.