Roommates & Soulmates

Ch173: Magnus's Bottle

"You did what?!" Magnus's voice echoed across the whole apartment.

"Sold my car to invest with your dad," Alec said in a calm voice. "I don't understand what the big deal is."

"Alexander Gideon Lightwood!" Magnus began. "There are so many reasons why that is a big deal."

"It's okay though," Alec said. "Because he showed me all the figures, and it's a sure thing."

"There is no such thing as a sure thing," Magnus explained. "It's a con."

"No he wouldn't do that," Alec disagreed. "He's your dad."

"Only genetically," Magnus snapped.

"Just relax," Alec tried to assure him. "Once the investment matures I'll get the money back and more. It's no big deal."

Magnus covered his face with his hand, hanging his head. Why did his beautiful blue eyed soulmate have to be this dense. "No Alec," Magnus said, calmly but with perfect confidence. "I've tried to tell you, but you never listen. He isn't genuine. He isn't sincere. He doesn't value your time or your efforts. He only wants something from you. I wasn't totally sure what it was until now, though I could have guessed: money."

"No what he wants is time with you," Alec disagreed. "He's your father and you won't even talk to him."

"Almost anyone can conceive a child," Magnus said, firmly. "That doesn't give them father status." He paused for only a second to breathe. "Father's read their children's bedtime stories, father's pick their kids up from school, father's take their kids shopping when they outgrow their clothes, but most of all father's are there. Present from the start. They don't just show up and make nice the moment you marry money."

With that Magnus stormed off. He just couldn't be in this fight anymore. Moving with all the surplus energy his emotions had given him, Magnus stomped off to his bedroom, slamming the door behind him.

To his great surprise Magnus found himself crying. What the hell was going on? He didn't care this much about never having a father, did he? Surely he was just upset because he hated fighting with his husband.

Magnus tried to think of all the wonderful ways his aunt had made his childhood wholesome. He tried to remember each time she showed him she cared and focus on that. Focus on the actions of a true parent. Like the times she'd got off work early to make sure the house was decorated for the holidays before he got home from school. Everytime she'd held him when he'd cried, especially that last time when he'd gone home for Christmas and realized he should be with Alec. Then there were the times when she'd taken him out for ice cream after he'd had a bad day at school. He smiled as he thought of how she used his baby name, Mags, even sometimes now as a term of endearment. Aleida valued his happiness the way a parent did.

She was enough. He didn't need to be disappointed by a man who was far less than he appeared.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Magnus?" Alec's gentle voice came through the closed door. "Magnus, is it okay if I come in?" After a moment Magnus replied, saying he could enter.

Once Alec stood in front of him, Magnus didn't have the emotional energy to be mad anymore. He just reached forward and hugged his husband.

"Are you okay?" Alec asked. "I didn't realize you had all that stuff bottled up inside."

"Neither did I," Magnus sniffed, pulling Alec a little closer. He definitely needed this hug.

"He'll never be what I'd like him to be," Magnus sighed. "And having him around and yet not enough, I think it's worse than if he wasn't here at all." He paused and added with an emotional exhale. "And if by some miracle he was enough, if he got better or we worked things out, it would feel like betraying Aleida."