poetry by a girl who's afraid of herself //

you make my heart hurt.

i used to be your world.
i used to be your princess. and now she is. now she is and i'm sitting in awe of how things changed so quickly. and you hurt me so much and yet i'm still in your life being there for you. i know things about you that she probably doesn't. i know everything i can about you. and i see you and i talk to you and i am continuously looking at something i can't have anymore. i want to be your world. i want to be your princess. but i was just a short chapter to the beginning of yours with her. i was just a pawn in this long excruciating game that i well knowingly play. i love you. i love you with all of my being. with every nerve in my body. with every breath i draw and you don't. i cried , well i still do. i cry over you and i bet
you didn't shed one tear for me. but you cried buckets full for her. you told me i love you first. and i believed you. and i shouldn't have. i truly believed you loved me the way i loved you and i should have known better because you couldn't have ever been capable of the love i had for you to return it. i look at you and i still love you and it's been five months. that's how much i love you that i'm STILL not over you. you got over me in two days right after you broke my heart. you made me believe you were my home when i was just the welcome mat; never truly being able to grasp what home felt like. should have known better is all i have to say. i hope i get over you soon because i'm getting really fucking sick of picking myself up from someone who doesn't even care that i've fallen.