Stop acting like you don't have an affect on this world. You are so goddamn special to everyone, not just your family, and not just me. I know you're in pain, and I know it kills you even more to not know why it hurts so much; but you are enough. In fact, you are more than enough. You are so much enough, I almost can't believe it. But I do. Because even if the side of you that's shown at school isn't a fair representation of who you really are, I know that you are practically the embodiment of humor, and kindness, and loveliness. I appreciate who you are so much, and how unapologetically you that you are. Don't fucking tell me that this isn't you; this human fascinated with linguistics, and helping people, and romance, and intelligently-produced movies. Even if you say the goofy persona you execute on campus is indeed a falsification of who you are, I don't believe you. Even when you're hurting, you have the ability to laugh and smile and put on this act that everything is okay—this is a form of strength, and you must keep this. You must stay strong. This pain won't last forever, kid. It comes in waves, I know, but some days are better than others and you must stick around for the good days. The good days are definitely worth wading out the bad ones for. The days where you're surrounded by people you love and everything is okay, if only for a moment. The days where happiness envelopes you, and you're filled to the brim with love and adoration for the beauty of the moment, and the beauty of this world. Kid, I know you can get through it. And I'll be right here for the bad days; the days where you just feel like jumping off a bridge, or hanging, or diving deep into alcohol poisoning—I'll be here. I'll hug you. I'll throw you a ladder to help you out of the fucking chasm. I'll hold you. I will help you realize that there are good things. I will have you remember the things you love, and the people you adore, and moments where you felt like you were flying from the goddamn joy of it all.
It will be okay. I fucking promise. And I will be here every step of the way.
Because when it comes right down to it... I can't lose another person. And if you're falling, I need to catch you. I need to save you.
YOU ARE READING
random thoughts & scrawls
Randomthis is simply where i post all of my randomly thought of and scrawled out stories/thoughts/ideas/words in general
